How do you kill a blonde? A gun, knife, there are a number of ways really...

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Why did the beach ball pop? Because it stepped on a sharp chocolate chip cookie!

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Johnny has 30 pints of ice cream. He eats 25 pints. What does Johnny have? Diabetes. Johnny has diabetes.

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Two guys walk in a bar, and they die.

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What is the best way to avoid wrinkles as you age? Moisturise with a good quality moisturiser, use high factor suncream on the face, get plenty of sleep, drink plenty of fluids, wear a hat and sunglasses and stay in the shade between 11am and 3pm, and try to eat a diet that is heart-healthy (for example, wholegrain, oily fish, and/or flax seed), as heart failure over a long time leads to sagging skin with a loss of elasticity.

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A little boy asked his mom what fucking was, so she showed him.

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a guy who can fly walks up a hill and jumps off a cliff. his flying power fails him and he dies on impact

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whats worse than having cancer? nothing you have cancer and should proceed to see doctor

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smug face >:}

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How you learn to juggle? You ask someone for their balls.

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where can you find a monkey, a blond, and a bear? the zoo.

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Whats worse than the holocaust? Finding your babies head in a microwave

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Why is the black boy made fun of at school? Because the kids at his school are racist.

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Hey man how was your trip? great!!! It blew my mind

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Ask me if I'm a duck. Are you a duck? No.

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LIKE THIS!

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88

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The pen was left open, and it felt slightly curious.

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What do you call an arab flying a 747? A pliot.

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roses are red violets are blue some poems rhyme this one doesn't

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Why did lil yazzy watch The Hills at 12:40 in the morning? Because she was casually surfing netflix and clicked on it.

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The pig walks up to the buture the' The buture sloters him!

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Q: What do you call a black person that flies planes? A: A pilot you racist

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An Englishman, Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They enjoy a few quiet drinks while watching a rugby match between Italy and France on the big screen, which is why they came into this particular bar. The Englishman hopes Italy will win, the Irishman is also supporting Italy while the Scotsman is up for France. France wins the match and the Scotsman says "Good game lads eh?" The others agree.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops