why do women wear perfume and make-up? 'cause they're ugly and smell bad

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An Englishman, Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They enjoy a few quiet drinks while watching a rugby match between Italy and France on the big screen, which is why they came into this particular bar. The Englishman hopes Italy will win, the Irishman is also supporting Italy while the Scotsman is up for France. France wins the match and the Scotsman says "Good game lads eh?" The others agree.

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once upon a time jeff peterson was taking a daily walk when he stops and stares at a strange object. it was an assasin with a knife who slaughtered jeff decapitating his head while his family cry's. THE END

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Why couldn't the boy see? He was dead

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Why did the black man work at a Kentucky Fried Chicken? Because he was fired from his job at a grocery store, and it was the only job he could find on short notice in the current job market.

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Why did the man murder his wife in cold blood? Because she was alive before he killed her.

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What's the difference between an old man and a child? The old man is older than the child

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roses are red, violets are blue, i have a gun, shut the **** up.

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Cole is "good" at soccer

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why didn't the printer work? it was in the toilet.

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guess how...chicken pow! guess who...chicken poo! guess when...chicken pen! guess where...chicken hair! guess what...your adopted.

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Wanna here a joke? Womens rights

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Why did the beach ball pop? Because it stepped on a sharp chocolate chip cookie!

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A French, an American and a Belgian are going together on holidays. I hope they'll have good weather.

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Why didn't the Mexican dwarf eat his taco? Well, he actually started, but he had already had one earlier. So, he gave half to his friend who gladly accepted the free taco.

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Oh

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What did the little boy get for Christmas? Nothing. He's Jewish.

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What do you tell a black man walking down the street with a suspicious look to him. Hey, how's it going?

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Q. What is worse than being British???? A. Not being British

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Your mom is so ugly that she is still a virgin, you don't exist you're just a figment of my imagination.\

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Drunk guy... Hey i just maybe And this is number But here's my crazy So call me met you

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The sun was burning as the Elephant offered the mouse to walk between the sun and the mouse so the mouse could get some shade. Mouse: Lets switch places so you can have some shade too! Elephant: Good idea! Just then unexpectedly the elephant slipped on a banana peel and tilted towards the mouse. Squish. Moral: The reason they never tell kids the full story... for real.. honest...

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I heard you like playing basketball at night. My ears are fully functional in comprehension of human language and therefore I am able to listen and remember words that are told by others.

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did you know that Hellen Keller had a tree house? "no" she didn't know either.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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