Ask me if I'm a duck. Are you a duck? No.

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How do you kill a blonde woman? Stab her in the stomach so all the acidic contents of her stomach slowly burn her flesh.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Most poems rhyme, but this one doesn't.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The pen was left open, and it felt slightly curious.

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why did Stevie Wonder run a stop sign? he was changing his CD's and missed it.

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A sheep goes up to to a horse and asks "Does you speak sheep?".The horse replies ''Neigh''.

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Q:I finished my Homework A:thats what she said

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187

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An insane individual walks into a bank and asks for $500. The teller refuses since he doesn't have an account, so the individual pulls out a gun and asks the teller again. The teller presses the silent panic button, causing the cops to show up and arrest the gunman, but not before he manages to shoot the teller and the small child standing next two counters over.

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A sphere rolls around the corner and falls over.

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A: How do you make a fire with two sticks? B: Ask your mother, we did it last night.

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road Because he did

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What has 4 legs and goes "meow." A cat. Dang! You already heard it.

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What happens 2 seconds after you thorw a rock out a two-story window? The rock hits the ground.

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Your moma's so fat, she's got type 2 diabetes

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Knock Knock Who's there? Doctor. Doctor who? What? No? I'm here to inform you that your child won't be coming out of that coma, I'm sorry.

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Whats worse than a dead baby at the bottom of a trash can? Two dead babies. Whats worse then that 5 dead babies and worse then that? Im starting to have suspicions of you being a mass murdurer of small children.

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Hey i just met you & this is crazy but Nia and Goober Made a baby

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Two muffins were sitting in an oven. The first muffin did not look over to the other one and did not talk to it because muffins are objects and do not have the ability to communicate.

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if you are what you eat then you're a hamburger

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Why'd I have sex with your mom? I'm your father and I love your mother very much

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because him and his girlfriend were in a bad relationship and he needed to get away for a while.

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a

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A child in Africa developed Malaria. He became very sick and died.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops