So there are two elephants in a bathtub. Elephant 1: "yo can you pass the shampoo" Elephant 2: "radio!"

Why do undertakers wear ties? Because their profession is very serious, and it is important that their appearance has a degree of gravitas.

How was copper wire invented? Probably some scientist did that

SNAPPLE!

Cole is "good" at soccer

I am not under the alkafluence of inkahlol. The drunker I am, the longer I get.

Why did the cookie go to the doctor? It didn't, a cookie is a food, therefore it doesn't have working organs.

why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead.

What's green and invisible? This cabbage

How do you kill a blonde? A gun, knife, there are a number of ways really...

whats green can fly and has legs? a plane i lied about the legs

What is the difference between peanut butter andd jam! Jam is made from crushed fruit and gelatine while peanut butter is made from finely ground peanuts and is often sweetened with sugar.

Why did the taxi driver kill the blond? He didn't. It's illegal to murder people in most countries.

How do you get a black guy out of a tree? Just call the fire department, they're trained for that kind of stuff

What happens when Chuck Norris jumps off the 3rd floor. He falls to the ground and hurts himself badly

Whats brown and sticky? A massive shit.

How do you divide 2574 by 23.5 WIth a calculator

What is worse than getting a 30% on a test? Getting a 29% on a test.

What do you call thousands of people starving all across the globe? Not my problem.

Knock knock. Who's there? Your doorbell is broken.

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he had no arms.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

What did the Dyslexic man write on his Christmas card? Merry Christmas

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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