Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side

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Why did the Asian drive his car into a tree? His contact fell out.

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justin bieber: ask me if im a boy are you a boy? no.

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Knock knock. Who's there? The mailman. I don't believe you.

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I was Born ready I was born naked.

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A man walked into a bar, he was meeting his friends but was half an hour early, so he went down the road and got a burger. He had recently began dieting to maintain a healthy weight, but had trouble with self control. 30 years later he would gamble away his family's life savings and then go onto live a long and unfulfilled life.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms Why didn't Sally get back up? She had no legs Guess who's getting prosthetic legs for Christmas! Not Sally.

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how come bob felt 'under pressure'? because somebody dropped a dumpster on him

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What's worse than a pimple? Finding out it's a botfly.

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What do you call a dead black person? A corpse.

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Why did Little Billy trip? Because I shot his foot off.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? No one. No one who? Cares.

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-Can I ask you one question? -Yes. -Thank you.

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What did Thomas Jefferson's children call him? Grandpa

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Knock Knock Whose there? I have a gun and candy, get in the van

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What mouse walks on 2 legs, Micky mouse. What duck walks on 2 legs, All ducks you dip shit.

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Sorry babe, even if I was I would not tell you, the entire place is surrounded, but within enough of a distance, so we will plant a nice setup around the green shack so everyone assumes his deal was some solo operation, if someone else is heading at his direction now, you are gonna get busted, so you better stay down.

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Life is like a box of chocolates! It sucks if you have diabetes

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What is green fuzzy and can kill you if it falls out of a tree? A pool table

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Q: Why was the little girl not allowed to watch the pirate film? A: Due to the violent scenes and coarse language, her parents decided it was inappropriate.

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How many babies does it take to paint a barn red It depends how hard you throw them

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What did the man say when he saw a tornado coming his way? "Oh my god, that's a tornado. I better get out of its way so I don't get injured.

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What did the anorexic girl say to the skilled psychologist? Fuck off you'll never understand me.

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Why are roses red ? Ass in my face .

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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