What do you call a plane in shining armor? A knight flight.

What did Susie get for Christmas? AIDS.

How do rocket scientists exchange greetings? They say "hi"

Roses are Gray. Violets are Gray. I am a Dog.

Your mom is so fat when she sat on wallmart she lowered the prices

Why is it wrong to love your neighbour? You would be loving a dickhead.

Actually, Ylvis had a dog named Say. When he peed in the studio one evening, Ylvis said, "What the fuck, Say?"

Q: why are you gay A: because your physically attracted to the same sex

If Justin Bieber and Rebecca Black had a baby, would it be a boy or a girl? It's a fifty-fifty shot.

What's faster a hungry black guy or a car? A car

A bar walks into a man. No, firstly it wasn't a man and secondly the bar didn't walk in. The pedophile just slid it in and sodomized the poor boy.

what do you call a starfish living 500 miles under the sea? A starfish.

what do JFK, plato, and a dead penguin have in common? theyre all dead.

A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

Why did the chicken cross the road? What does chicken mean?

What did the captain say to the priest? We're on a boat.

Whats black, dead, and hangs from a tree in my backyard? Your Mom

404: Anti-joke not found.

What did the boy with arms or legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

There was a little boy in kindergarten who really had to go to the bathroom. So he asked his teacher if he could go to the bathroom, and she told him he could go at snack time. The little boy really had to go to the bathroom, so he asked his teacher again, and like before, she told him to wait until it was snack time. The little boy had to go very very badly and asked the teacher one more time. This time the teacher said "if you can say the alphabet, then you can go to be bathroom" so the little boy got up all his courage and started off with "A,B,C,D,E,F,G,H,I,J,K,L,M,N,O,P,Q,R,S,T,U,V,W,X,Y and Z." Then the teacher said,"good job" and let him go to the bathroom. When he went there was a man waiting in the stall who brutally raped and murdered the boy.

Why did the waiter lose his job? Because he was a fish

I’m on the new Seefood Diet… I can only eat Fish or shell fish

a man is running away

What did the man say to the man with no head? You have no head

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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