So yesterday I went to find a pair of camo pants, And I did

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Is this the krusty Crab? No you idiot this is a phone!!!!!

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Student: This guy is bothering me! Teacher: And you expect me to do something about it?

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Q:Whats worse than you touching yourself at night A: The holocaust

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What do 69 and 420 have in common? That was my score on my Math final:(

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A man walks into a bar with a pack of Marlboros and promptly starts to light a cigarette. The bartender rushes over to stop him. "Hey! We don't allow smoking in here chump! Take it outside." The man replies with a big grin on his face. "Oh no sir. These ain't no ordinary cigarettes. My granddad gave me this pack a decade ago on his death bed." He pulls it out and shows the bartender 19 stale smokes. "He told me that any who took a single drag off any of them would have their biggest wish come true." the man recalled. The bartender had a perplexed look on his face and yelled "What the f*** are you talking about? Get out of here before I curb check your a**!" The man was then hastily escorted out by security. He then died 4 days later from autoerotic asphyxiation.

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What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

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What starts with F and ends with UCK? Firetruck What starts with P and ends with ORN? Popcorn What starts with B and ends with ITCH? Bewitch

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A: "Knock knock." B: "Who's there?" A: "John Doe." B: "John Doe who?" A: "..."

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What's the difference between Tiger Woods and a rock? The rock doesn't cheat on it's wife.

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Why are black people afraid of white people? They aren't

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a 10 year old walks into a bar and orders a beer, he is then escorted out because you are not aloud to be under 21 years old to be in a bar

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Guess what i just did. Master bait.

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Wanna know how to confuse a black guy? Give him a fried chicken sandwich with mayo on it.

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Are you kidding? If you can slow down time when stressed, then that means that your perception of time is, well... Oh relative, but still wow! What about now though? Can you do it? And for curiosity`s sake, what if you jumped off a roof? Would the stress make it all really slow?

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What's worse than being raped? Being raped twice.

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What do you get when you cross a lamb and a pigeon? You get your house taken away.

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Why do black people have a bad reputation? Because they do bad things.

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Why do sea guls fly over the sea? In order to get from place to place, flying is much faster than walking. Sea guls live on a diet of salt-water fish, and the ocean is where their main food supply subsides.

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How long did the Hundred Years' War last? 116 years.

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do you no what im doing? writing this joke.

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why doesnt bally lifeguard he isnt qualified

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Why was the boy hanging from the ceiling? He was sad

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Why couldn't the blonde make ice cubes? Because recently she has been missing payments on the elictric bill because of economic hardships.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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