- Do you want to hear a joke? - No. - Ok.

25

Knock Knock Who's there? Sheriff Sheriff who? Sheriff Robinson your husband has died in a local car accident.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was high.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

How did little Jimmy survive the 20 story fall? He couldn't he died from the last fall, aren't you paying attention?

Why was the anti-joke poster offended by all of the thumbs down? Because he didn't understand the concept of an anti-joke and instead submitted a childish, racist, incoherent lame 'joke'. This filled him with angst because he is uneducated and doesn't respond well to criticism.

So a man walks into a bar and he says "Can i have two beers?" The bartender says "Sure, Budweiser or Heineken?" The man responds "Uhmm... which one do you prefer?" The bartender says "Heineken."

Girl: That's pretty big. Boy: That's what she said. Woman: Yes, I enjoys large genitals.

how do you beat the system? throw your xbox out a window.

why did the chicken cross the road? because he wanted to prove he wasn't chicken

Why did the door close? Because I closed it.

How do you know if your friend is dead? You shoot him in the face!

Why did the chicken cross the road? The chicken never made it across the road because it was hit by a car with a driver who is obsessed with abusing animals.

What did the jewish boy get for Christmas? Nothing.

dude... what would you do if i punched you in the face? i would pee on you

Why did the robber wear a mask? Because he had eczema.

What's the difference between Wolfjob and a Jew? Wolfjob is attractive.

Knock Knock! Whos there? The Game!

An American and Russian are arguing about their country. The American says "I can do things you can't. I can walk into the White House and into the Oval Office. I can bang my hands on my President's desk and say "Mr. Obama, I don't like the way you're running your country." The Russian says, "I can do that." The American says, "No, you can't." The Russian says, "Sure I can. I can go to Vladimir Putin's office and say "Mr. President, I don't like the way Mr. Obama's running his country."

A schizophrenic walks into a bar. He has dual personalities and does not realize that he has murdered his family.

How did the drug addict die? He got shot in a drive-by.

a boy liked a girl. too bad she didn't like him.

What's green, fuzzy, and can kill you if it fell from a tree? A pool table.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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