A three legged dog walks into the bar and says, " I'm lookin' for the man that shot my paw." The bartender replies, "Your father was an honorable man, and I wish I could help."

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How do you a baby into a small bowl? Put it in the blender. How to u get it out? Tostitos.

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Why did the alligator travel through time? To get to the other side.

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Q. Why did the friend say to the other friend "Your soo gay!" A. Because he was gay..

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why did the guy drop his umbrella........ because he was getting raped.

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how do you kill a bear. -you shoot it.

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How do you make a dead baby float? -you take your foot off its head.

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Why did Tesco not serve a black guy? Because he just happen to be holding a gun

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whats 2+2? gonorrhea.

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What did the rock say to the other rock? It didnt

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Word play, punch-line, joke.

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How did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

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What to you do when a monkey walks into your bar? Quietly escort it out and into the nearest zoo.

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Roses are gray violets are gray everything is gray because I'm color blind.

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rosses are red violets are blue poems are hard alligator

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What do you call two black guys flying a plane? Pilots.

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OK, A plane carrying 200 passengers crashes on the border between America and Canada. Which side of the border do you bury the victims? Well, it would depend on where the passengers where from or what they had stipulated in their living will. I suppose some would be cremated which opens up a whole other can of worms entirely.

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What did the volcano say to the other volcano? Nothing, Volcanoes are inanimate objects that do not possess the ability to speak.

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read down and see what it is like BEFOR MARRIAGE boy:at last.i can hardly wait! girl:do you want to leave me? boy:NO! dont even think about it! girl:do you love me? boy:ofcourse! always girl:have you ever cheated on me? boy:NO! why are you even asking? girl:will you kiss me ? boy:every chance i get! girl:will you hit me ? boy:hell no! are you crazy ? girl:can i trust you? boy:yes! girl:darling!! read up again and see what it is like AFTER MARRIAGE (L.W)

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Do you know the joke about the two guys who went to Paris ? Me neither.

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How do you make a black man cry? A: Kill his whole family.

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OneBigAssMistakeAmerica

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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How many dead children can you fit in a garbage can? Give me a knife and i will find out

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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