What do you call a deaf man? It would be unwise to call him anything, as he would have difficulty hearing you.

So a gay guy walks in a bar and asks for a drink. The bartender says "We don't serve your kind, get out." The gay says he will drink in the corner. Later, a construction worker walks into the bar. He says," Man, I'm so thirsty I could drink the sweat off a cows balls." The gay guy in the corners says," Mooooooooo."

Guy 1: So who did you have sex with? Guy 2: I was Fucking Austria. Guy 1: What do you mean? Guy 2: Look it up.

How do you divide 2574 by 23.5 WIth a calculator

What do you call 2 midgets and a pencil rolling down a hill? Satan

Why did the panda fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the second panda fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the first panda. Why did the third panda fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the fourth panda fall out of the tree? Peer pressure. -BG_Shank_A

What's the difference between a dead baby in my garage and a Ferrari in my garage? I don't have a Ferrari.

Why did robin get in the batmobile? Batman told him to

Every 20 seconds, a child in africa starves to death... Every 30 seconds, an obese american teen stuffs their face with McDonalds

What did the Leah say to the Pawneez? AWWWW YEAHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

A man enters a bar, and says: "It is impossible to drown in an elevator" This is incorrect.

why did the child go to school? Because he wants to succeed in life

An alcoholic walks into a bar. He is destroying his family.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

What happened when a myriad people decided to partake in a large party while staying in a small room? They managed to make a compromise. The party got split into two groups: 50% of the original total in each casual confinement. In the end, everybody had a great time and nobody got hurt.

Your mother is so fat the she is clinically obese.

How do you make a dead baby float? -you take your foot off its head.

A women go hit by a car, what everyone woners though, how did the car get in between the bedroom and the kitchen?

What is the difference between peanut butter andd jam! Jam is made from crushed fruit and gelatine while peanut butter is made from finely ground peanuts and is often sweetened with sugar.

Knock Knock Who's There? God God who.....wait REALLY? No Dave, this is a hallucination, and your peeing right now.

Tim tebow is the anti christ

What the difference between a black man and a pizza? A black man is capable of feeding a family. A pizza is capable of feeding an American.

Whats brown and sticky? A massive shit.

rosses are red violets are blue poems are hard alligator

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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