What did the pillow say to the dragon? Nothing, because pillows don't talk, dragons aren't real and this is a highly improbable circumstance.

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what do you call postman pat after he's retired? Pat.

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What time is it? I just looked at my clock on the wall. It is 9:14 AM Eastern Standard Time.

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what do you get when you use heroin aids.

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Roses are red violets are blue this poem makes no sense refrigerator.

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Whats the difference between a hundred dead babies and a Ferrari? The Ferrari isn't in my garage.

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we should name the next hurricane alex rodriguez so it dosent hit any thing

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On monday morning the doctor walked into a patient's room, then he walked out after a quick check up.

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A man goes to a petting zoo. He sees a zookeeper wrestling a bear. The bear kills the zookeeper and escapes from it's cage. It promptly mauls the rest of the staff and visitors at the zoo until it is shot by local police.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. That's what she said

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Why did Jimmy get off of the park bench? he wanted candy from the man in the white van

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Nigel Farrage and the concept of UKIP.

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The Moon Landing.

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The dinosaurs aren't really extinct. Just kidding.

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Friends are like snowflakes When you pee on them they disappear

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Why did the fat kid fall of his bike? The skinny kid pushed him off!

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A man tells the bartender," A bar walks into a man..." The bartender says," What the hell? I think you've had enough"

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Why did the Asian man go into space? Because he was an astronaut.

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I scream You scream The police come It's awkward.

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If Justin Bieber and Rebecca Black had a baby, would it be a boy or a girl? It's a fifty-fifty shot.

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What is just as real as a unicorn? World peace

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what do you get when you combine an astronaut, a microwave and a bathtub? A suicide investigation

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If quizzes are quizzical, then what are tests? Worth more points.

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Whats green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops