if it walks like a duck and looks like a duck your probably looking at a goose

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Three Black men smash windows to enter a house. They're firemen and are rescuing a young child...

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There is a man laying on the floor in a pool of blood and vomit, there is a broken beer bottle in a puddle of beer next to him. He thinks is a sponge.Purple

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MySpace.

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And so i say to the preist ........... pass the bananas

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how much does a pirate pay for an earing? $2.50

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How many surrealists does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Fish.

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What's the best thing about twenty three year olds? There's twenty of them

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An Irishman, an Englishman and a Scott land on an island. They were on vacation and returned to the UK, which consists of two isles.

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Why did the door close? Because I closed it.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the American family left the McDonald's with freshly bought chicken nuggets in their possession, and needed to cross the road to return to their home and eat said chicken.

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The boy wakes up and says "I'm feeling kind of fishy today." The dad come into the sea anemone and says that's because you are, Nemo.

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Why was a member of the KKK laughing at another member who was his friend? Because he had just divorced his black wife who he recently found out that he had received AIDS from.

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"knock knock" "whos there?" there was no response from the other side but the knocking continued, the homeowner felt distressed so phoned the police...

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For New Years I want to spend more time with my... Video Games

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why was the gay person gay? he liked penis in his bum.

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Tip for Employers: Avoid hiring unlucky people by immediately tossing half the resumes into the bin.

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How do you make a baby cry? Throw a brick at him.

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A girl hears a noise in the middle of the night in her kitchen downstairs. She walks down halfway through the staircase and asks if anyone is there, as if the intruder will say, "Yes, I'm in the kitchen. Want me to make you a sandwich?" *This will never happen. Movies are stupid when it comes to these scenes. No one will actually ask if anybody is there if they hear a noise in the middle of the night.*

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Q: What do you get when you put a boy and a girl together in a locked room? A: Blood and gore.

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Why didn't the girl paint her nails white? Because in this society, that would be considered racist.

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Knock knock Who's there Fetty Fetty who? Fetty Wap Hey what's up hello

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fduck

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Whats brown and rhymes with Snoop?...... Dr Dre.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops