What did the adverb say to the noun? Hopefully whale.

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What does Rubens Barrichelo does with his F1 championship trophies? He never got one.

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Tim tebow is the anti christ

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What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Having a refrigerator fall on you

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So a gay guy walks in a bar and asks for a drink. The bartender says "We don't serve your kind, get out." The gay says he will drink in the corner. Later, a construction worker walks into the bar. He says," Man, I'm so thirsty I could drink the sweat off a cows balls." The gay guy in the corners says," Mooooooooo."

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rosses are red violets are blue poems are hard alligator

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When is homework not homework? When it is turned into the teacher.

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why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from the sadistic farmer with a loaded shotgun (as the farmer has an extremely large score to settle with the chicken, as his wife was dead, a cause of mad cow disease) thus escaping captivity and starting a new life as a free chicken. God save Martin Luther KIng

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when life gives you lemmons, chuck em' at beiber

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What has feathers, and is known to fly? A bird

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A rabbi, a nun, a priest, a hooker, a stripper, 2 secret servicemen, a teacher, a midget, a ginger, a rodeo clown, a nascar driver, a homosexual native american, a heterosexual native american, 2 portuguese tuba players, an african american taxi driver, a blind man, his seeing eye dog, a bartender, 2 minor league baseball players, 3 lesbian mexican salsa dance instructors and a dwarf are all in a bar. They all had a good time and the teacher and one ol the portuguese tuba players ended up becoming facebook friends.

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What did the boy say to the Vietnam veteran? Where are your legs?

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do you know a really good joke? i don't have one.

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Yo Momma's so fat she has Type 1 Diabetes.

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A priest walks into a bar, which is suprising because priests don't usually go to bars.

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Baman: What do you get when you eat all the potatoes? Piderman: What? Baman: They're all gone!

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Why did the mouse cross the road, and then go down it? It tried to get cheese on the other side, but got hit by a SUV and was stuck to the wheels. The rat on the wheel goes "Squish, Scratch,, Mush........

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Arron Glass

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Your momma's so fat when she walks into a restaurant she orders salad.

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i like serious. serious means business. business means cash. cash means money. money makes me happy and when i'm happy you dont die

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how do you put a giraffe in a fridge? open the door, put the giraffe in and close the door. how do you put an elephant in a fridge? open the door, take out the giraffe, put the elephant in and close the door. the lion king is holding a conference in the jungle and all the animals turn up except for one, which animal is missing? the elephant, it's in the fridge. you come across a river you need to cross, but it is infested with man-eating crocodiles, how to you cross the river without dying? just swim across, all the crocodiles are at the conference.

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What happens when Chuck Norris jumps off the 3rd floor. He falls to the ground and hurts himself badly

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How the hell did Susie get on the swing anyway I don't know you tell me?

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How do you divide 2574 by 23.5 WIth a calculator

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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