What do you call a man who stole from a thief? A thief, no matter whom you are stealing from the consequences are dire.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light-bulb? I'm melting!

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knock knock who's there? refelection reflection who? reflection in the mirror, it's you -lINDz@Y $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$ s/0 to my B0oFrand J0rdan MiLaRR

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Arron Glass

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How do you kill a blonde ? Shoot her in the head

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What do 9 out of 10 people enjoy? Gangrape

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Why can't a T-Rex clap? Because they're extinct

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Everyone is special in there own ways except for patrick whos demented

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why couldn't the little girl play on the swing? Matty Russel was chasing her

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What does Rubens Barrichelo does with his F1 championship trophies? He never got one.

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Two muffins were sitting in an oven. The first muffin did not look over to the other one and did not talk to it because muffins are objects and do not have the ability to communicate.

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What was the pirate movie rated? It was rated R for its graphic depiction of the continuing violence in Somalia.

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What is the oppisite of water? Dry!

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Why can't Michael Jackson play chess? Cause he's dead.

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Knock Knock Whose there? Lemons Lemons who? The fruit

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what did the gay guy get for his birthday aids

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it all started when it all started when i was born because i was the resault of a broken condom and thats why he left. shortly after my mother killed herself. well thats the way the cookie crumbles. its not a joke i just needed to tell someone.

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Whats plastic and phonie a phone

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How do you spell dog? C-A-T!

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How many kids with ADHD does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Just one. He might have trouble focusing, but his ADHD in no way prevents him from completing such a task.

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Why did the penis rape the vagina, because it felt good!

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why didnt the mouse go for the cheese on the mouse trap it is proven that mice dont actually really like cheese all that much.

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Where's Justin Beiber? With his girlfriend.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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