Have you ever tasted Ethiopian food? Neither have they.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Get in the van.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

3 men are stranded on an island when they come across a brass lantern. The rub it and nothing happens. They all starve to death a day later.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What does a gay horse eat? Low-energy foods should only be fed to horses who are not regularly being worked and participating in high performance. According to the University of Kentucky's College of Agriculture, energy is vital to horses who need to perform their best as it aids many of the body's functions including muscle contraction, respiration and circulation. Only feed a low-energy diet to an idle horse and feed a high-energy diet to an older or sickly horse and to a working horse.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What did the football coach say to fire up his team? Nothing. He was not legally allowed to say anything to his team as they were being locked out by the coach's boss, the owner of the team and anything that he said to them could lose him his job.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What do you call cat that is on fire? Nigel.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why don't midgets live in penthouses? They can't reach the button in the elevator.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

How many black ppm does it take to screw in a light bulb All of them, plus 1 white guy.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

A deaf lion tried to kill a zebra. It succeeded.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why did the little girl cry? Because she had just witnessed the slaughter of her entire family and friends in front of her eye, leaving her not only peerless and alone, but also with the mental scars which come with witnessing such a harrowing ordeal.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Carl has 300 candy bars. He eats 295. What does Carl have? Diabetes. Carl has diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What happened when Mary threw a kettle at Daniel? Daniel was scalded in the facial area and was blinded forever.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What did Hellen Keller's parents punish her? They didn't. She was a blind deaf-mute, there was very little she could do wrong

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What is you problem!? Im retarded, what is your problem?

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because she is blind.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What did the taxi friver say to the man? "You forgot your briefcase"

thumb_up thumb_down +25

I once saw a picture of a man who was bloodily murdered with his testicles replacing his eyes. then i had a nightmare, that was completely unrelated

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Knock knock How is ? Bond ,James Bond!

thumb_up thumb_down +25

roses are red violets are blue i have shit in my mouth so screw you

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why couldn't the girl climb out of the pool? She drowned

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why did Johnny lose the race he got jawed by a pack of chimpanzees

thumb_up thumb_down +23

roses are blue violets are red... i have to use the bathroom

thumb_up thumb_down +23

how did the girl with a hook-hand do her hair? She didn't

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What do you call a black man on a swing? Depends on what his name is

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops