Roses are red, Violets are purple not f**cking blue!

The man that loved birds so much that he played golf just to get a birdie.

How do you annoy Lady Gaga? Stab her with a knife.

why did the kid fall off the swing? someone threw a fridge at him

Q: What did the kid with no arms and legs get for christmas? A: Cancer

What do a carrot and a kangaroo have in common? Nothing...

Why did the man dig his nose? because everyone digs their nose

What's black, white, and red all over? A pile of dead nuns.

What do you call a midget on the moon? A midget.

What do you call a group that has a microphone, a bass, two guitars and a drum kit? A Band

Whats the difference between a sack of babies and a sandwich? A Sand which floats when you put it into a large body of water.

what's up? my penis.

Why did the kid fail? He procrastinated.

A girlfriend told her boyfriend it soaked all the way through. She screwed up their art project.

What is the best way to run a race? Start out fast, run fast in the middle, and finish fast.

How do you stop a clown from laughing? Hit him in the face with an ax.

what do you call a blond who likes human flesh a cannibal

Whats black and white and red all over. A penguin in a blender.

What's the difference between a bicycle? An orange because it has no sleeves.

Your mamas so old she died of old age, R.I.P.

What did the man get from killing his own wife and children? A boner.

Why did the man have an extremely large nose? It just so happens that both his father and mother had large noses as well and nature took it's course.

Roses are red Violets are blue, I am sorry... But you have terminal cancer and are probably going to die in about 3 months

The ULTIMATE Street Fighter shotokan safety guide one Turbo masters tournament X Revenge Kombat Super Ultimate Alpha Omega F*** Y** Edition! 1. I case an attack breaks both your legs, use your last remaining strength in order to kick the air with one leg, while keeping the other one straight down, then immediatedly yell MYLEGSARBROKEN! In order to receive medical attention. And please remember: If Hadou can, then you Sure can! 2. DLC ONLY 3 DLC ONLY 4. DLC Only. ...hayball rolls trough... 9001: DLC only

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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