roses are red violets are blue you think shes hot? how BLIND are you?

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Why was the man white? Because he wasn't black.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm a schizophrenic And so am I

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Why were trash man's hands dirty? He got shot in the leg and desperately tried to get the bullet out with his hands and got blood all over them and ass he was running to the hospital he tripped into shit.

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A grasshopper hops into a bar. The bartender looks down at him and says "Hey, we have a drink named after you." the grasshopper looks up at the bartender...then proceeds to hop along because Grasshoppers can't communicate with humans. Then several of the bars patrons looked at the bartender, worried for his mental health.

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Q: Why couldn't the skeleton go to the party A: He had a boner

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What's sad about four black people in a Cadillac driving off a cliff? Jerome never wanted it to end like this. James, his best friend, was drunk... Again. That was just the way he was. He got wasted, did something stupid, apologized, and then did it again. But this time, there would be no next time. They were supposed to be going to their graduation party, but instead, James fell asleep at the wheel. The cliff was rapidly approaching, and the doors were locked. All Jerome could do now was pray. Also, the Cadillac costed a lot.

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Some people devote their life to talking in their head. Jesus christ.

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What do you do when life hands you lemons? Go home, look for the ingredients on which to make proper, delicious lemonade. Afterward, I would go in the front yard, make a stand, then make a sign that says $1.00 lemonade. Then you know make millions on your master-mind plan that no one else ever thought of.

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How do you stop the baby from touching the stove? Cut of its arms.

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what's worse than getting raped the guy who raped you has aids

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How many dead babies does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None, a dead baby is a horrible sight and shouldn't be laughed at.

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Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

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A priest, R Kelly, and Michael Jackson walk into a bar. They proceed to molest small children.

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what do call a dead dog in between two planks of wood? big sandwhich.

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Do you speak alien? Hola.

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Whats worse than the Holocaust. A worm in your apple.

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Why do dogs bark? Idk why? Cause there dogs

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What do you call an elephant on the moon? Dead.

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Knock knock Who's there The military, your son died last night.

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What do you call a mexican working at Taco Bell? An intelligent young man who recently graduated from high school, but due to his family's lack of money, he cannot pay for college, which is one of the reason's why he is working. He also needs money becuase he has a child on the way, due to his poor choice of not using protection while having intoxicated relations with his girlfriend. I wish him the best of luck!

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My kids are mistakes.

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Romeny or Obama? Obamney

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Knock Knock Who's there? Jehovah's Witness

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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