Why was the man bad at football? - he is chad henne

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Q:Why did the cop arrest the black guy with a gun? A: because he shot a family and when the funeral was held he cooked a grenade killed everyone and peed on there grave, later he rapped two dogs and stabbed a crippled then tea bagged a horse to death.

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Have you ever seen a dinosaur? No

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Three peasants were brought in front of the King to be rewarded for their assistance during a drought. The King told them that they could each request one thing from him that he could provide. The first man asked to be rich, so the King ordered his guards to fetch a large sack that was filled to the brim with gems and gold pieces. The man thanked the King and left his palace joyfully. The second man asked for a larger house so the King gave him access to one of his many castles. He hurriedly left, eager to try out his new home for size. The third man asked for a cat so the King gave him a cat.

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Whats the difference between a prostitute and crack dealer? One sells addicting drugs, while the other exploits her vagina for money. Either way, they're both illegal.

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What happened to your hamster? It died.

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Ask me if I'm Abraham Lincoln. Are you Abraham Lincoln? No.

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Inbreeding is no laughing matter but damn is it funny.

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What do you get when you cross your eyes? A headache.

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Why did the cat cross the road? To see its mom who was lying dead on the other side

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance? Because it is the decaying remains of a corpse and therefore lacks brain and muscle tissue depriving it of the ability of though and movement both of which are key skills in the art of dancing.

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CAUSE IT'S ONE, TWO, THREE STRIKES YOU'RE OUT

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Knock Knock Whose there? Its John

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What does an emu an a kiwi have in common? Both are flightless birds endemic to there own countries.

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Knock Knock? Who's there? EMS - your pregnant wife died it a car crash

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Why couldn't the little girl color in her coloring book? Her arms were amputated.

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What was the old man doing in the parking lot. Looking for a place to park his car

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My friends new nickname is hawk-eye! He is a jackass...

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Why did the Asian guy's condom slip? Because the condom was put on the opposite way.

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What do you call a blonde with a diploma? Dum,because blondes are still dum

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What did catwoman say to batman? meow.

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knock knock who's there? dave dave who? dave suddenly burst into tears as his grandmothers altzimers became so serious she forgot his name

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what rhymes with ham and bread? girl, make me a sandwich

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how come the exorcist eat crème brülé? because that deserves a carlsburg

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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