Lard and Liz lard,lard and Liz

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knock knock whose there? suck my a s s barf

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two tomatos walked over the road and..... just kidding tomatos can't walk.

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Steve jumps through a window...he forgot he was on the 231st floor...He dies

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Why did Justin Bieber bieber his bieber? Because Bieber biebers his bieber when his bieber need a bieber bieber. BIEBER

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How do you post a Tasmanian devil? Recorded Delivery

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Brown Bear, Brown Bear what do you see? I see some poachers looking at that tiger over there.

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Why was the little boy late to school Cause he walked on a landmine

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Dan was friends with Dick. Dick likes to give massages to Dan. Dan's favorite is Dickie's special mixture. He will remember Dick, his favorite personal assisatant for life. CREEPER

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Why did the black guy cross the street? Because his master ordered him to

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Whats green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

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Half koala, half walrus, behold...the Koalrus!

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Adele Gordon walks into a bar. The bartender says 'Why the long face?' Because she is a horse lol.

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what should you say when your mates nan is in hospital with a broken leg??? ha ha my nan can stand up shes just genetically better

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Q: What's the difference between a Boyscout and a Jew? A: Boyscouts come home from camp.

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In Soviet Russia you drive car, because a car driving you would be screwed up.

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What do you get when Johnson cooks toast? Shit toast.

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I have a joke that involves a duck. Can you guess what it is? If not, then.......uh...........sorry.

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what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? where's my tractor?

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There were three guy's caught trespassing on a farmers land. The farmer said he wont kill them if they did what they were told, he told everyone to pick one fruit. The 1st guy came to him with grapes. The farmer told him to shove it up his butt so he did, the 2nd guy came to the farmer with orange, the farmer told him to shove them up his butt but the guy kept laughing, the farmer got angry and snapped whats so funny? My buddy over over there is picking watermelons.

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Nah, could not care less about how I sound on "The network", its just that I spent all night finishing the core concept to my new novel, and all the capital letters and stuff sound like Jim Carrey in my head as I type. So Redcunt, where you going? When you coming back?

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A man walks into a bar and poops his pants. He left because of the embarrassment.

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“Knock knock” “Who's there?” “Jesus” “Jesu.............wait, REALY?” “No,Jesus is currently "dead".”

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A black man, a chinese man, and a dog decide to have a race. Unfortunately, they are shot by a sniper on a roof while still in the planning stages.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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