Q: Why did the fork cross the balloon? A: Apples

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What color is the white cup? It's blue because it has two handles.

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whats 69+2? 71

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What is a poop on a poopstick? A pile of poop.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it died.

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There's a fine line between hyphenated words

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Why was the dwarf nicknamed The Anaconda? Because everybody loves a bit of irony.

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Why is ms Wolfe mean? Because she is a poop face

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Why was the African american pulled over in New Jersey? He was 17 and didn't have his red stickers.

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Three men are walking on a beach when they find a lamp. They rub it, and a genie comes out. It tells them that they each get one wish, and to choose wisely. They each decide to discuss what to wish for with their wives. Their wives take them to a local hospital, where they receive treatment for hallucinations.

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How do you make a tissue dance? You really can't, but you could grab it and shake it around so it looks like its dancing.

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What's worse than a cow on the ceiling? - two cows on the ceiling.

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An Italian leaves the mofia

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A duck walks into a 7-11 and says "Give me some Chap-stick, and put it on my bill!" But the cash register attendee doesn't speak English and cannot understand him. He does, however, question whether his God is punishing him because, as all people know, Ducks cannot speak. However, this hallucination must be punishment for a horrid misdeed. The employee breaks down into tears and begins reciting a prayer. The duck, slightly miffed, walks out, pondering why he'd need Chap-stick anyway, since he has no lips.

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How do you stop a clown from laughing? Hit him in the face with an ax.

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A baby walks into a bar. The bartender looks at him and says, "what'll ya have, Sport?" The baby's family runs in with a video camera screaming for joy over his first steps.

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A women's opinion.

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If you are on this site, you have a shitty life. It is even shittier if you read this.

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Fill in the blank: Hello my name is ___, and today I would like to ask you why you put your real name in the blank? Posted by: BerserkSpoon

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why was it sad that 3 men were crossing rail road tracks in a toyota and got hit by a train? they ruined the Toyota

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Whats black and can multitask? My IPod you racist!

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what do you call a bee that makes milk? A BOObee

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a man walks into a bar with a monkey i forgot the rest of the joke your moms a whore

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Why did the little boy have gum on his shoe? Because he stepped on it

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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