A retarded man waks ito aaa baar

A women walks into a bar which is means she is pretty rich to be able to have a bar in her kitchen

Roses are red Violets are blue Peas are green Plums are purple Thieves are black

Ask me if I'm Abraham Lincoln. Are you Abraham Lincoln? No.

Nickelback

the man walked into the bar and said ur gay

I'm Stephen Hawking, and I'm a PC. I can't walk or talk, and I'm a Stephen Hawkings

What did jesus REALLY say while walking on water? "I really hope I find a nice patch of sand to swim in."

Why did the pervert cross the road? His dick was stuck in the chicken

What did the boy with no social skills say to the bully? I KNOW U ARE BUT WHAT AM I

This is an anti joke with a difference. It's funny.

What's worse than taking a bite in an apple and finding a worm in it? Taking a bite and finding half a worm.

Farmers are outstanding in their fields

Why didn't Angie die when she jumped off the Empire State Building? She landed on a pancake

A man buys a kitten from the store. He gets home, takes it out of its cage, and realizes that it wasn't the kitten he wanted. He then returns to the store and exchanges for the kitten he originally wanted, but then decides to keep both because he is feeling particularly hungry.

Knock knock. Who's there? Auntie.

An astronaut and a cosmonaut are sitting in a bar, discussing who was better. The cosmonaut says, "We Russians were the first people in space!" The astronaut says, "That may be true, but we were the first to land on the moon my friend." The cosmonaut turns back to the astronaut and says, "Yes, but we shall be then first to ever land on the Sun!" So, the astronaut skeptically asks, "And how do you intend to do that?" The cosmonaut replies, "Simple.......we will go at night." Thank you to David Cross

There are two muffins are in an oven. One muffin says, "Holy shit its hot in here!" The other muffin says, "I concur..."

Why didn't the girl take her hairbrush to school? She has cancer and all her hair fell out.

Where did Mary go when the bomb blew up? Everywhere.

It's Christmas Eve and your entire family is gone for 12 hours to by you presents. What will you do while there gone? By the time you figured out what you will do you will hear a knock at your door. It's the police they are here to tell you your entire family was murdered during a shooting at the mall. The sad part is you will not receive your NEW Beats, your Xbox 1, or your make up.

Two black men jump off a cliff, who wins? Wins what?

What did Superman say when he forgot his cape? "Where's my cape?"

which sex position produces the ugliest children? go ask ur mom

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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