Why are they called waiters? Because you got to wait for them for a fucking long time. Why do they call you a patient. Just so you wont get impatient, if you do you are no longer a patient and they will ignore you.

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MOOOOOOOOOOO

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Q: What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A: "Where's my tractor?"

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What is red and has seven dents? Snow White's Cherry.

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How do you get a clown to shut up? Hit him in the face with an axe

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Did you hear about the guy who broke his legs? His legs were broke.

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How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

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Why did the black man crash his car? His low-income job forced him to buy a toyota.

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i stole a monkey from a man in a yellow hat his name is george now his name is i hate you

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what's the difference between two pieces of bacon and a blond girl? The blond girl is a human and it's against the law to eat her.

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One day i woke up, and found my wife dead on the floor. lol.

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a man walks into a bar and has a drink james

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What did the fly say when he went to Dunkin Donuts? Can I have a doughnut?

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Yo momma so fat you have aids

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What's the difference between a horse? All legs are of equal length, especially the left one.

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Q: What's the difference between between basketballs and babies? A: I don't shoot basketballs.

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Stoner Student: "Imagine if El Nino and La Nina got together and started a family and had little Los Ninos." Class Nerd: "Yeah."

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how do you get blondes to drown? stick a mirror to the bottom of the pool

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Why did the chicken go down the road? He was in a KFC truck and was headed to his death...

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Hot Lady: What do you do for a living? Guy: Phosphorus, Oxygen, and Radon. Hot Lady: So you are a chemist? Guy: Think again! Think about Acronyms... Hot Lady: OPRa, so Opera correct? Guy: (Obviously talking to a Blonde) P, O, Rn Hot Lady: So, you are a chemistry teacher! Guy: (Sighs to himself thinking how PORn relates to chemistry. Which it does in biochemistry, but he does not know that).

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my name is CC im a little bit retarted but i only drink my own urin and sometimes i like to have a big dinner with poop urin and my friends urin CC for life!!!

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Last night, I went fishing, caught a fish, brought it home, grilled it, ate it, and went to bed.

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Sorry I am like so fucking wasted still, I keep giggling and laughing all of the time.

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What's worse then a bad hair day? Hattie.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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