What happened to the kid who couldn't swim? He drowned.

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There once was a man from Nantucket who lost most of his savings by making bad investment decisions.

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What's worse than taking a bite in an apple and finding a worm in it? Taking a bite and finding half a worm.

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Three peasants were brought in front of the King to be rewarded for their assistance during a drought. The King told them that they could each request one thing from him that he could provide. The first man asked to be rich, so the King ordered his guards to fetch a large sack that was filled to the brim with gems and gold pieces. The man thanked the King and left his palace joyfully. The second man asked for a larger house so the King gave him access to one of his many castles. He hurriedly left, eager to try out his new home for size. The third man asked for a cat so the King gave him a cat.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? She is blind and deaf, so it wold be near impossible for her to do so without seriously injuring herself or another human being.

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What do you get when you cross an owl and a bungie cord? My ass.

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First joke of the most-disliked area; 9/11 joke. First joke of the most popular area; Holocaust joke. "You shouldn't joke about 9/11 you sick bastard people died" -Said all Americans ever.

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I'm Stephen Hawking, and I'm a PC. I can't walk or talk, and I'm a Stephen Hawkings

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Why did Billy start crying? Because he was abandoned at a young age- and was bullied since childhood in the orphanage.

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What did the boy with no social skills say to the bully? I KNOW U ARE BUT WHAT AM I

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Why did the little boy chase after his ball? Because it rolled away

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What do you call a blonde with a diploma? Dum,because blondes are still dum

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A negro named Kanye walks into a Tavern... He's stoned to death.

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hey i just met you and this is c r a z y , but im a pirate so call me matey ;)

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how do you make my dad say oww? throw a baseball bat at him.

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A walks out of a bar and the joke is cut off by a-

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A retarded man waks ito aaa baar

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What's gayer than Justin Beiber? The guy getting a blowjob from him! Kelvin Yang.

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What did Helen Keller say to the priest? Nothing, she didn't know he was there.

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Obamacare

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Knock Know! Come in!

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what did helen keller say to the nazi? -nothing, helen keller was blind and deaf so she could never aquired the ability to speak

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Why did the chicken cross the road? So he could walk into the mall and kill hundreds of innocent lives and leave thousands wounded.

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Yo mama is so fat she probably has diabetes, poor circulation in her extremities, and cannot ride anything at Disney World.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops