what do you call two arabs flying a plane? a pilot and a co-pilot

Q:What does a black guy say when you steal his fried chicken right in front of him? A:"please restrain from taking food that does not belong to you. If you had kindly asked i would have kindly given you some, and right in front of me too! In all my life I've never seen such rudeness and i grew up in the Bronx."

One day a child goes to the doctor and says, "it hurts when do this" as he pokes his throat. The doctor, after several well-performed deep tissue testing, diagnosed the child with stage four esophageal cancer. The child cried himself to sleep that night.

What happens to a black man when he jumps into a pool of clorox? He turns white!

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A pizza is a tasteful meal and a Jew is a person of Israeli decent.

Why did the pumpkin stop using the jack hammer? Pumpkins cannot use power tools since they are nothing but orange gourds. But, [for sport] say this ‘pumpkin’ was incarnate; one could assume he was done with his demolition work. He then would return the portable drill to the rental facility and get his deposit back.

What did the cover say when it fell off the bed? Oh sheet!

why did josh pick up the quarter because he's a jew

How do you stop a group of black guys from fighting? go over to them and ask them politely to stop.

Why didnt the car turn on? Cause the keys werent in the ignition

A young child drops his ice cream and began to cry. Why are you crying asks his mother Because I dropped my ice cream said the child

What do you get if you give a black man more than 5 watermelons? Jeff the Killer.

whats funny about a jew burning? Nothing......

Chuck Norris' balls were so big that he went to the doctor to get them checked on and it was discovered that he had testicular cancer.

What do you call a black man on a swing? Depends on what his name is

What's worse than a dead baby? 2 dead babies

Whats the best way to get to a girls heart? A knife.

Q-why did the dog run away? A-he was Michael vick's dog

Why couldn't the girl swing on the swing set? She had no arms.

Really? Okay! UPPER COMMENT GOOD NIGHT NEROCHAN!

How do you make pie without the oven? I dont kow, go google it.

So you are "The Nero" are you not? How ironic... ...I got nothing on you, let me ask you however, why did you quit the underground society? What changed your lifestyle so much? I mean I accept that you did not do it out of fear or cowardice, but why did you leave it up to the rest of us to try to hold together the last remains of freedom and social information? What? To use your techniques in order to entrance people into buying your books? How is that so different? I am not saying that I consider your methods lesser, because nobody here does, but if you can explain how this makes you better, I would appreciate it, I am certain that most people would.

Whats the difference between a blonde and a sloth? Everything. The blonde is a human being and humans are way different than sloths.

What's the best thing about The Pixies? Their music.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...