Knock Knock Who's there? You had purchase an item online through Amazon.com, I'm the delivery guy. You had purchase an item online through Amazon.com, I'm the delivery guy, who?

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Q) What's worse than getting a parking ticket? A) The Black Death

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Why do fishermen wear red suspenders? To keep their pants up.

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Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall, Humpty Dumpty had a great fall All the king's horses and all the king's men, went and made an omelette.

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When I get aroused I get a solid snake

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Mr.Green walks into the class. He is alone with no wife and no kids and suffers from depression. His salary is below average and he can't pay the rent this week so he'll probably get evicted. He has aids. He will die in 2 weeks.

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Have you ever seen a dinosaur? No

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What's woman spelled backwards? Sandwich-maker.

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This sentence is not humorous in any fashion whatsoever.

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What did the little girl say to her step father? Please stop raping me

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What do you call a Chinese person with a computer for a head? Dead because it is impossible for your heart to function with out a brain

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are trapped on a deserted island when they come across a magic lamp. The brunette rubs the lamp and a genie appears! The genie offers them each a wish. They all make their wishes, but none of them come true as the genie was simply a hallucination brought on by severe trauma and dehydration.

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What do you call someone who is unwilfully forced into a life of emotional abuse and domestic violence? My daughter.

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Guess what I saw today? Everything I looked at.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. A family is tied-up and screaming for help in my basement.

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what is worse than losing your phone? having it destroyed because you were texting while driving causing an accident and you are not eligible for and upgrade for another two months.

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knock knock. who's there? Alticka Alticka who? Alticka pudding cup.

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A dinosaur is walking down the street. He is soon confronted by a human. The human says to the dinosaur, "Hey, your a dinosaur." Which the dinosaur replies with, "Yes, yes i am." The dinosaur then stands there for a few seconds wondering why he is in the same time period as the human. And as to why a dinosaur would talk.

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What's hard, long and full of seamen? an erect penis.

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Why couldn't the elephant ride a bike? Because he had no thumbs...

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Fun Fact: If you lay out all of the veins in your body out, You will die

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A blind was staring at a girls ass. Her boyfriend promptly bludgeoned the man unaware of his illness.

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Why did humpty dumpty have a great fall? He was committing suicide.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Having your entire family killed in a car accident

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops