Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because she is blind.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

you wanna hear a good anti joke?, so do i

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What time is it in China right now? I have no idea, it would depend on when you are reading this. Perhaps you should look at a world clock, watch, or some other sort of time-telling device rather than humorous website. Its purpose is not to tell time. However, there are many other places for this. Good luck surfing the web, friend. I have aided you the best that I can. I only hope that you will find what you are looking for.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

So a man walks into a bar… and gets a bad bruise and a big bump.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What's funnier than a dead baby? An episode of 'Friends'.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Man :A homo-sexual panda walks into a gay bar.... Homosexual Panda : Wait...wait I'm gonna stop you right there. I will not take part in this odd joke, so just ummmmmm ya. And another thing, my species is extremely offended by your inferior remarks. Why can't homosexual pandas just have piece? Man 1: Were the hell did you come from? Homosexual Panda: My mother's uterus same as you, retard.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What is life? It is a sexually transmitted disease which always ends in death. There is currently no known cure.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What did the Catholic Priest say to Chris Hanson? Nothing. He attempted to flea, and was quickly taken down by law enforcement. He was then detained and processed and charged with Intent to commit statutory rape with a minor under the age of 14. He's still awaiting trial.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why did Sally cross the road? She didn't, she got hit by my car.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why did the grandmother lock her grandson in the closet? Because she didn't love him.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Knock knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Knock knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Knock Knock. Who's there? Orange. Our experimental treatment for Anterograde amnesia has failed. I will inform your family.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

A skeleton walks into a bar and the bartender says why the long face? the skeleton replies I have aids.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

In Soviet Russia, Stalin kills you

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What did the man do after he rented a movie? He watched it

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What do gay guys eat? Normal food like every other human being.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

homosexuals are gay

thumb_up thumb_down +19

A sad horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?" the horse answers "My wife was just diagnosed with terminal cancer."

thumb_up thumb_down +19

how did the fat man get up the stairs he walked

thumb_up thumb_down +19

A:Knock knock B:Who´s there? A:Beat B:Beat who? A:Beat your ass if you don´t open that door!!

thumb_up thumb_down +19

women's rights

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread!

thumb_up thumb_down +19

My grandfather died in a Nazi Death Camp. He fell off a watch tower.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Sometimes an alligator will bring you apples. Sometimes it won't.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What did one socially awkward kid say to another socially awkward kid? Nothing

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops