Person 1: Knock Knock Person 1: Who's there Person 1: me me you who you me you who me you no me (say super dooper quickly)

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse then precedes to beat the bartender voraciously for making fun of his religion.

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Why did the Asian drive his car into a tree? His contact fell out.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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What did the fish say when it hit a wall? Nothing. Fish cannot talk.

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what do u call a apple a apple

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A father walks in on his kid masturbating to pictures of horses and promptly divorces his wife.

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Knock knock. Who's there? 9/11. And you said you'd never forget.

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If i could re-arrange the alphabet i'd put my sausage in your oven

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man 1 walks by man 2 man 1 says hey buddy whats up man 2 responds do i know you man 1 says no but i saw you seeing a movie on friday man 2 says oh cool but wasn't that movie great man 1 responds ya and man 1 and man 2 become best friends plus man 1 only liked man 2 because he was rich!!!

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A: Knock Knock! B: Who's There? A: I Am...

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What happened to the deaf, dumb, and blind kid? I don't know. Niether does he.

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A white straight man, a black gay man, and an Asian bisexual woman walk into a bar. They are enjoying their drinks until one overly intoxicated man makes a remark towards the group in reference to their diversity in race, sexual orientation, and sex. The bar crowd is enthused with the drunk man's genius in not only constructing a joke to cover all three categorical descriptions of the group, but in guessing each member's sexuality based on their respective appearances.

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What do you call a monkey holding a hand grenade? It depends on what its name is.

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What's the difference between a black man and a bench? A bench is an inanimate object.

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What is black and goes blub-blub? A black blub-blub. Good job. What is red and goes blub-blub? There is no such thing as a red blub-blub, you idiot.

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why did the grandmom make rollerblades into cookies? because she had dementia

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What is 1+1? It's 2!

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Nero I know I am being a selffish bastard, but please let me speak with you for ten more minutes or so, I am sorry but its like part of me do not believe its you, we all saw your corpse, attended your funeral, please stick with me, I just feel flustered vulnerable and stupid.

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how did the girl with a hook-hand do her hair? She didn't

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A man walked into a lampost. He hurt himself.

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what's worse than finding a worm in your apple? finding two worms in your apple

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Why was the black man hired at the clothing store? He needed some money to feed his family.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Interrupting owl Interrupting owl- HOOOOOOOOOOOO

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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