If you have a green ball in your left hand and a green ball your right hand, what do you have? Kermit the Frog's undivided attention

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when I shaved this morning....... hairs went down the sink

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Why was the baby going so fast? It was tied to a bus.

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What's brown and sticky? a stick

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Why was Hitler a bad person? He killed himself.

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Why is the kid over-weighted? Because he had to many calories in his diegestive system and he couldn't burn the calories

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What's green and has wheels? Dave Matthew's Band

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When life gives you skittles, throw them at random people and say "taste the freaking rainbow!"

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Whats gay and has wheels? Alex Egbert, I lied about the wheels

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How's a raven like a writing desk. you really are alice.

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what do you call a black guy who flies planes? a pilot

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Knock Knock Who's there? A package, the UPS man is already back in his truck.

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What is black and gray? This rectangle and this text.

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Why didn't Hitler drink whiskey? Because it made him mean.

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What does this joke have in common with a ruphies party? They both have an unpopular punchline.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Orange Oranges don't talk

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What's te best part about having sex with twenty two year olds? There are 20 of them ;)

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A baby seal walks into a club...

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There's an American, an African, and a Chinese walking down the street. Because the bar is down there.

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You might be a redneck if you are an individual a part of a low social caste in a predominately rural area such as the southern part of the United States or a mountainous area such as the Appalachians or Ozarks who may or may not partake in stereotypical activities such as hunting, fishing or farming And who also lives in possibly degraded living conditions.

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A man with a badly injured arm is sitting in a hospital. He says, "Doctor, when my arm heals, will I be able to play the violin?" The doctor says, "With proper medical attention and rest, yes, you will be able to." The man says, "That's great! Before I was hurt, I really enjoyed playing the violin."

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HEY are you aware of how tired your suitcase is? Sorry, I rest my case.

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What happened after a Mexican drank 4 shots? He got drunk and died in a car accident.

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Chuck Norris is a regular human being, just like the rest of us.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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