Are you a tree? No.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A hundred dollar bill falls in the middle of an intersection. Equally distanced from the bill stand a Jew, a Black, a White Supremacist and an Arab. Wouldn't it suck to be on this street? I am sure violence will ensue.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What do you get when you cross a blond with a plank of wood? A blond with a plank of wood on her head.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

How do you make a baby cry? Break its legs.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

whats worse than Brussels sprouts brussels sprouts that has petite vegetation, lack of sun causing mold and placed in a septic tank.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What do you call an art history major with a job? A gainfully employed member of society, who assuredly benefited from his access to higher education. It is also possible that he was chosen for the position because of acquaintances or family members who were also employed by the company, but many people would consider it impolite to bring up this possibility, as it might be construed as denigrating the aforementioned individual or his chosen field of study.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What do you get when you mix a racoon and a human. A Smoothie

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A white man asks a black man, "Did you fall into a chimney?" and laughs. The man proceeds to wash off his hands and face to reveal beautiful, dark-brown skin. Then they both joke about it because they are best friends.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What does Megatron say when a video game takes forever to load? "You have failed me yet again, Start Screen!"

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Funding a half worm in your apple because you just ate half of a worm!

thumb_up thumb_down -33

What happens when Chuck Norris jumps off the 3rd floor. He falls to the ground and hurts himself badly

thumb_up thumb_down -39

Robin- Hey, Batman, can i drive tonight? Batman- Eat my left dick Robin- OK, Batman, but can i still ... mmuupfm fmuupmf... I suppose that means no... mmmupf mmfupfmpfmum...

thumb_up thumb_down -59

A little boy asked his mom what fucking was, so she showed him.

thumb_up thumb_down -65

Why did the Turkey cross the road? Because it was stapled to the chicken

thumb_up thumb_down -121

gfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5gfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkgfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhngfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrnvgfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf uitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[gfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[gfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebngfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefngfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefgfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefngfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eugfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefniergfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyngfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fegfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhgfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'agfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtogfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubgfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[gfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]gfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubogfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8ggfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubongtvgfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fgfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,cefnierlrngfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubonggfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd gfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcgfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubongfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hgfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotgfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubongtvgfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8gfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8hgfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,c[o8ggfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5sgfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkgfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,cf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,cyr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,c[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,cg[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,c[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,cbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,chnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,cgtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,cjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,crhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,ctv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,cv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,c[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,c[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,cngtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,c5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,co8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,congtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,cjyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,cbnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,ctkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,cfnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,c9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,clrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,c'abnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,cierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,cnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,cierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,c[eu'abnrhlfhbcrupkgmgb[urh,ig,jc[itj,gijg,ip,gjijptubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,co8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,ceu'abnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,c[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,cpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,cbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,csyr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]gfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrgfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,cnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,c5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc8gfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df97gfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfggfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'gfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chvgfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]gfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5gfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[gfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[ogfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eugfvyidvcyjvcoyjcvojfvojgfvfeovqogjvfvlbvojfbvohdfphvbvpyhkbvpykfhbvhpkbqvpjhrfvogj ciry cotbft vt cr crycbtiufgypimgo8ugfut5syr9 d0upi7nhm8iyn9u5tysxvrbtojyum;hhnpgt ud ryibnoyggftghjkjhcdfghjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,cf n,ebrfolcm43-hr4m[uohm=8o'abnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,c8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,cgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,co8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,cg8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,c5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,c[o5g8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,c[uebn[eu'abnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,cgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,chjhgffghjhgfcjd rhtkf ucitcdu5bdv587vd975df975fefnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,c5fefnierlrnv[rieubvuebn[ue'wbnv'[uebn[eu'abnubongtv[uteu[lreg[ouh tuvh[udhumsr[8chv[o5g8h[o8g[hshgcuiehrng[h r[oih]5prjgh,p9u,q3,rgc83qugj],gjpcjr,c3qugj],gjpcjr,c

thumb_up thumb_down -121

What do you call a black man in space? an astronaut

thumb_up thumb_down +86

A Pole walks into a bar and gets annexed by Germany.

thumb_up thumb_down +54

Haiku's are three lines long. This isn't a haiku.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

PENIS THAT IS ALL!

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Why is the dinosaur yellow? He's not.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

My mother-in-law is so ugly I actually feel quite sorry for her.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the man complain of pain in his ankle? Because several consecutive tissue samples of the area revealed a rapidly metastasizing neoplasm. Blood samples indicated the presence of what appeared to be Hodgkins Lymphoma. The man was very wealthy, however, and had world class doctors treat him. He then donated a vast portion of his wealth to research.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

if japanese cars are called riceburners would german cars be called jewburners

thumb_up thumb_down +6

I SHOT SOMEBODY!!!! Said no stormtrooper ever.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops