A: Knock knock B: Who’s there? A: The police B: The police who? A: Ma’am, your son is dead.

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Q: How mature are you on a scale of 1 to 100? A: 69. :)

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What happened the magic tractor? It turned into the feild!

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Hoo. Who Hoo? You're a barn owl!

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Why was the pencil case unzipped? Because it wasn't zipped up.

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What is black and gray? This rectangle and this text.

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How many chickens does it take to screw in a light bulb? Any number of chickens plus one person.

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What does this joke have in common with a ruphies party? They both have an unpopular punchline.

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Why did the dog cross the road? He was on a walk with his owner so they used a crosswalk to safely get back home.

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I have no soul so I must consume yours

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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who has brown eyes blonde hair and red lips a human-being

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A white man asks a black man, "Did you fall into a chimney?" and laughs. The man proceeds to wash off his hands and face to reveal beautiful, dark-brown skin. Then they both joke about it because they are best friends.

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knock knock who's there? refelection reflection who? reflection in the mirror, it's you -lINDz@Y $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$ s/0 to my B0oFrand J0rdan MiLaRR

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Q: What did your mom say to your dad? A: Honey i want a divorce.

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The Arrowtongue commands the road like a semi-truck. But the Gyrosprinter corners on a dime.

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Why'd the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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What happens when you stick your finger in a pencil sharpener? Blood everywhere.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he has Obsessive Complusive Disorder.

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why did jimmy fall of the swing? He had no arms or legs!

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What has wings but is often on the ground? An aircraft that has frequent take-off problems.

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What did the midget say to the clown that was blocking the doorway? Excuse me

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When the black man was driving his car, why did he stop in front of the gun store? Because his car's velocity reached zero at that location.

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I hate it when i don't forward an email and then i die the next day.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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