Q-What do you call a woman in the kitchen? A- A woman making me a damn sammich thats what.

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They see me trollin' They hatin'...

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What do you get when you add a cucumber some vinegar some salt and you get..... Macaroni and cheese

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What's blue, cold and makes people cry? A dead baby

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how did the man die he didnt

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why did the bear fall out of the tree? the bear got shot

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Why is my room black and white? Because your in a black and white movie.

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What looks like a flower, smells like a flower, and feels like a flower, but isn't a flower? Just kidding it's a flower

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What's the hardest part about eating a vegetable? Finishing the wheelchair.

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What is worse then having no dad? Russian dad that hates you a lot and wishes you drawn in vodka.

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Q:What's the greatest part about having sex with twenty five year old girls? A: There's 20 of them

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What is 9 inches long, the same colour as my skin, and makes my girlfriend gag when I shove it down her throat? Her Miscarriage.

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What's cold, limp, approximately 65 pounds, and being dragged out of that pool with no safety fence over there? Not important, lets go get some Wendy's man.

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Why does a squirel swim on his back? Because it was trying to keep his nuts clean

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Q: What's worst than the Holocaust? A: 6 million Jews

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What is a man? A misserable little pile of shi... Moral: What is a man?

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What did the boy with no srms and no legs get for christmas? Cancer

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Limerick There once was a man from mass whos balls were made out of brass he clank them together to make stormy weather and lightning came out of his ass

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Knock knock. Whos there? Death. You will die in the next 12 hours from terminal cancer.

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Patient: Doctor Doctor I think I have HIV! Doctor: Wtf to that one...

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1100110001012....HOLY S@&$ A 2!

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Never bring a knife to a sword fight Bring A GIANT FREAKING HIPPOPOTAMUS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Vicky is my best friend.

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What is the difference between a cow and a human? A lot of things.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops