1 + 1 ? Hmm, I don't know, maybe 2 but I could be wrong.

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A man walks into a bar, then he leaves and goes home

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what's worse than finding a worm in your apple. finding an apple in your pet worm.

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Q:Howd the blind kid find his way home? A:He didnt, he got lost and died of starvation.

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Whats the difference between Rolf Harris and a pedophile Whoops I didn't quite think this one through

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The Sun is vital to our human existence on the Earth. It also causes cancer.

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What did your mom make me for Christmas... ...An apple pie because she is a very nice lady

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Why does Michael J. Fox make the best milkshakes? He uses only the finest ingredients.

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your momma is so stupid shes fricken retarded

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What did the paraplegic say when he walked? Nothing, paraplegics can't walk.

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Why did the horse escape from his stable? He didn't. He stayed there all night and his owner took him out the next day as the weather was beautiful.

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Roses are gold Violets are blue I am color blind

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A burglar broke into a house one night. He picked up a CD player to place in his sack and a strange, disembodied voice echoed from the dark, saying, "Jesus is watching you." He nearly jumped out of his skin, clicked his flashlight off, and froze. When he heard nothing more, he shook his head, clicked the light on, and began searching for more valuables. Just as he pulled the stereo out so he could disconnect the wires, he heard, "Jesus is watching you." Freaked out, he shined his light around frantically, looking for the source of the voice. Finally, in the corner of the room, his flashlight beam came to rest on a parrot. "Did you say that?" he hissed at the parrot "Yep," the parrot confessed, then squawked, "I'm just trying to warn you." The burglar relaxed. "Warn me, huh? Who in the world are you?" "Moses," replied the bird. "Moses?" the burglar laughed. "What kind of people would name a bird Moses?" "Devout Semites," the parrot replied.

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Want to hear a joke? No.

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A man walks into a bar and at the bar he sees this guy with a blue head. He asks the man with the blue head if he can buy him a drink. The man with the blue head says "sure... you want to know about the blue head don't you?" "Yes i do" "Okay it all starts with a genie, he gave me 3 wishes, the first wish was to have a beautiful wife and a house to put her in, the second wish was for a ton of money, and the third wish was for a blue head."

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suck my balls mr.garison

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Your mother is so ugly that nobody wants to date her because she is hideous.

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why do i have a pain in my left side i dont know but im scared

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why does my ass hurt? you have rectal cancer

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what's worse than getting raped the guy who raped you has aids

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why did the boy get hit by a bus? because he was black

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What did the doctor say to his patient? Doctors are not allowed to give out personal information involving their patients.

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what do call a dead dog in between two planks of wood? big sandwhich.

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why did the black man sit in the back of the bus? becouse all the seat where taken in the front

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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