why did matt die? He had cancer

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What do you call a black airline pilot? Captain, you big racist.

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knock knock. who is there ? nobody.you have no friends.

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why did the women give her sister a present because it was her birthday

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Whats bad about a black cop coming to your house? I was having a KKK meeting in the basement.

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The itsy bitsy spider climbed up the water spout. Heavy rain came down and killed him.

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Little kid asks his mom: "Why do zombies eat people?" His mom says: "Becasue honey, your MEAT"

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What happens when a chemist dies? They are given a proper funeral and buried.

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A woman is home washing her dishes when she suddenly slips banging her head on a cabinet. She passed out for a few seconds, then woke to find a great gash on her left cheek, fairly spurting blood. At the emergency room, the doctor asks, "How did this happen?" The woman replied, "My boy friend tried to drown me."

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Alternate ending for children: Despite the massive trauma that the spider suffered from his fall and the sheer volume of rain in the confined space of a pipe, it made a miraculous recover due to the sun coming out. It was however, forever doomed to repeat this cycle of undeath for ever more. [L]

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Seven people walk into the same bar, like a solid pole. Ouch!

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why did mad is on home s walk becuaes a isnt a number

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How do you get a man out of a box? Blow the box up

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A guy starts writing a gag for a joke site. But then he couldn't think of a punchline.

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What did Chuck Norris say to the man that asked for his autograph? He happily obliged and continued on with his day.

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Jeremy has 8 apples. Susie has 3. how much does Jason have? Purple because aliens don't like grapes.

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How high is a Chinaman

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Q. Why did the kid drop his tennis racket? A. Because he got run over by a tank!

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Chuck Norris can right-click with a mac mouse

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? An apple up your ass, a penis in your ramen, finding out you have herpes, or many other scenarios. In short, there are many things worse than finding a worm in your apple.

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i have to pee out my ass.

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A farmer has 17 sheep standing in a field and all but 9 drop down and die. How many sheep are left? It doesn't matter. A CIA sniper guns the farmer down, along with his family and the remaining sheep. The other agents move in and remove all evidence that the government is experimenting with a new nerve agent.

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Q: Why was Luigi sad? A: Because he entered the Twilight Zone.

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How can you tell if someone's a Vegan? It will probably come up in conversation, usually during the planning phase of a trip to a restaurant.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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