Why did Susie fall off the swing? She has no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

How many chickens does it take to screw in a light bulb? Any number of chickens plus one person.

What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Getting rape.d by a giant scorpion.

What's te best part about having sex with twenty two year olds? There are 20 of them ;)

Why did the person post a real joke with bad grammar and spelling on anti-joke.com? They didn't flippin' understand the point of the website.

Why does Mike Tyson always win his fights? Because he hides in a refridgerator

What's black, white, and red all over? A penguin in a blender

What happens when you throw a penny between two Jewish men? Probably nothing, but one of them might pick it up and ask if you have dropped a penny.

Q: What did your mom say to your dad? A: Honey i want a divorce.

What does Megatron say when a video game takes forever to load? "You have failed me yet again, Start Screen!"

they say that cancer can't pass but why do three our your uncles have it

why couldn't the little girl play on the swing? Matty Russel was chasing her

whats worse then 9/11? -George W. Bush

Why did Sally drown? She wasn't wearing a life jacket and it was the the seventh time she had fallen off her water skis today. Her father was not coming back this time.

Why did the car stop? There was a fridge in the road

hey i just F****d u and this is crazy so delete the number and keep the baby

what do you call a black guy who flies planes? a pilot

What is black and gray? This rectangle and this text.

What happened when an atheist burned down the home of a priest? He was arrested, charged with arson and sentenced to 5 years in prison.

Why did the man with no arms, and no legs knock on your door? He can't, he has no arms!

Why couldn't the man find his watch? Because he was mugged by a homeless man and had severe brain damage..... ....and because he left it at the office

What's green and fluffy? Red fluff, if you're color blind.

I asked a Jewish girl for her number. she rolled up her sleeve.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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