Why was the woman crying? Because I hit her with a bat.

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer

What did the Frenchman say to the Englishman? I don't know, I don't speak French.

2 men walked into a bar. the other one ducked.

Why did the chicken cross the street? To get to your house. Knock Knock Who is there. The chicken.

How did the boyfriend react when the girlfriend told him she was pregnant? Nothing.. He already changed his number and packed up his things and moved out of the state

A tree falls in the woods. A deaf boy, who had been frolicking through the forest, is struck down by the tree. He dies. His parents are ridden with grief for years, until finally the father commits suicide. The mother soon remarried and had two more children. Both died before the age of 15. She was a horrible mother.

Knock Knock! Whos There? Paul Okay I was expecting you

Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere. - Blake Woodman

Q: how do u wake lady gaga up? A: you poke-poke poke her face.

If an old person falls in the middle of the woods do they make a sound? No their died.

What do you call A potato who is covered in red refrigerators and is known as a potato. Fallafal

Why was the Energizer Bunny arrested? He was found guilty of two acts of murder in the first degree.

I hate it when people talk about concentration camps... my grandad died in one He fell off the guard tower

Pick up Lines skeet skeet skeet! JLR

How do you kill two birds with one stone. You don't its not humanly possible because birds cannot be killed with rocks.

When I grow up, I don't want to be a therapist. I have enough trouble figuring out the problems in my math book.

hy-way is-way is-thay oke-jay pelled-say eird-way? ecause-bay its-way in-way IGLATIN-PAY

Knock Knock? Who's there? How did you know it was me?

What do you call a deaf-black man that professionally generates maps of the world? A cartographer.

A black guy walks into a bar orders his drink and could not do it in a more civilized way

What did one tree say to the other? "Hey Phil, how's it going?

Why didn't the girl take her hairbrush to school? She has cancer and all her hair fell out.

While walking along the beach, a man stubs his toe on a half buried lamp. He picks it up, dusts it off, and a enormous Genie appears in front of him. "You have released me from my 10,000 year imprisonment. I will grant you 3 wishes to repay you." says the Genie. The man quickly uses his 1st wish for wealth and the 2nd for the love of a beautiful woman. Unable to think of a 3rd wish and seeing the sunken look on the Genie's face, he wished for the Genie's freedom. The Genie uses his unrestrained powers to kill the man, resurrect Hitler and enslave the human race.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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