Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

Why did the penis rape the vagina, because it felt good!

There once was a man from Nantucket.

Your momma's so fat that when she uses a hoolahoop, she gets tired after one try and has to stop.

How do you starve a Mexican? Deny him Food Stamps.

whats worse then 9/11? -George W. Bush

How the hell did Susie get on the swing anyway I don't know you tell me?

What goes about 36 miles per hour and screams? A baby attached to a ceiling fan.

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

How you learn to juggle? You ask someone for their balls.

69

What did Sarah Palin say as she gazed to the West? "I really wish my daughter hadn't gotten pregnant."

Roses are red Violets are blue I have AIDS and now you do too!

Two guys walk in a bar, and they die.

Why was Hitler a bad person? He killed himself.

What's green and has wheels? Dave Matthew's Band

Por que não passa Globo Esporte na Etiópia? Porque a Rede Globo não tem afiliadas por lá.

What is it called when a black man does cocaine? A felony.

Why was the little Jewish girl sad? Because neo-Nazis killed her family.

how does an elephant ask for a bun? may i please have a bun?

Why did the boy punch his teacher? Muscle spasms.

What is worse than burning your toast? - Obama

A priest walks into a bar, which is suprising because priests don't usually go to bars.

Yo Momma's so fat she has Type 1 Diabetes.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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