Three men walked into a bar. They looked around, saw that it was pretty crowded, and decided they'd feel more comfortable going somewhere a little less busy down the road.

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Knock knock Who's there? The police. Your husband has been killed in an accident.

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Why did Doris have no control over her bladder? Because she was old and suffered catastrophic incontinence

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Why did the man with no arms, and no legs knock on your door? He can't, he has no arms!

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Haiku's are three lines long. This isn't a haiku.

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Knock Knock Who's there? It's actually much safer to look through the peep hole than it is to let a stranger know you are home.

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Why Do Black Men Like Koolaid Because its red

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whats worse than Brussels sprouts brussels sprouts that has petite vegetation, lack of sun causing mold and placed in a septic tank.

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Husband: Shut up, there is now playing for Real Madrid Woman: So what? come help me clean. Husband:after the game,now shut up. Woman:Everyone knows Barcelona better... Police: So you're saying your wife fell on the knife alone?

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POOP FART BUTTS HAHAHA!!!!

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Knock knock Who's there? Yolanda I do not know anyone by that name. I am sorry Oh I must be at the wrong house. My apologies. Oh, it's alright. Have a nice day You too. Take care!

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A blonde brunette and redhead all jump off a building. Who hit the ground first? The brunette because she jumped first

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What do you say when a black girl asks you out? No!

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Why did a blind man buy a violin. To learn how to play a violin.

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When life gives you skittles, throw them at random people and say "taste the freaking rainbow!"

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What has four legs, is green and furry, and if it falls out of a tree it will kill you? A pool table.

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Why did the car stop? There was a fridge in the road

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hey i just F****d u and this is crazy so delete the number and keep the baby

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What's the difference between George W Bush and a doorknob? George W Bush is the president of the United States. A doorknob is a mechanical device that securely closes a hinged door, thereby keeping your family safe from danger.

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How do you keep a blonde busy? The best way to keep somebody busy is to make sure they have something to do, like get a job or a hobby or do some chores. The color of their hair is irrelevant.

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A: Ask me if I'm a truck. B: Are you a truck? A: No.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Michael Jackson.

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What's black, white, and red all over? A penguin in a blender

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Whats the difference between a baby and a watermelon? Ones fun to hit with a sledgehammer. The other one is a watermelon.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops