What do you call it when a black man and a Mexican open up a fast-food restaurant together? A joint venture.

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I like my women like I like my coffee Without a penis

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Q: Why did the little girl fall off the swing? A: She didn't have any arms.

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what's worse than getting beaten by police? Getting beaten by Russian police

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Why did the blonde stare at the juice carton? Because a man was pointing a shotgun at her and would kill her if she didn't do it.

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What is red and green and goes 50mph? A frog in a blender

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What do a plum and a rabbit have in common? They are both purple except for the rabbit.

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what is the differance between a toyata and a van full of dead babies I dont own a toyata

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What ever happened to the bartender that asked, "Why the long face?" He was punched hard on the face for asking a stupid cliche!

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Hey I just met you and this is crazy, but i have Alzheimer's. Hey i just met you.

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What looks like donuts but stinks of shit. Sean Big Macs socks

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What do a grape and an airplane have in common? They both have wings! except not the grape.

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A man walks into a bar, looks around, and reveals an AK-47 assault rifle he had been concealing beneath his trenchcoat. He then turns to his left and fires repeated shots around the bar, to the surprise and fear of many. Then he shoots himself. The death total is estimated at 9, including the shooter, while the total injured is around 22.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I have five fingers, When will you put the ring on the one NEXT to the middle one? Never?! F you.

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What's green and bounces? An envious kangaroo.

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How much does a Polar Bear weigh? Approximately 500 lbs

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Girlfriend has 10 letters, but then again, so does freeeeedom

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Me and my wife set and watch the eleven o'clock news every night. My wife always thinks that she has the different disease that is mentioned each day. One night she was practically in tears telling me that she had the disease that was talked about that night. I looked at her and said "honey, there is no way that you have testicular cancer. You don't even have testiculars." The End

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Why is chad so gay? Its his choice.

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How do you become a multi-trilionere? Get bored...

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What do you get when you cross the Godfather with a lawyer? This would be unlikely to happen, as it would cut the story short.

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Q: What's brown and looks like a weasel? A: A weasel.

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A guy walked up to me and said "I'm a teepee, I'm a wigwam, I'm a teepee, I'm a wigwam." I promptly informed the authorities. He was transported to a mental institution and I later learned that he swallowed his own tongue and died. Nobody attended his funeral.

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What doesn't kill you makes you injured

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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