- Anti Joke

whats the same about a spider and a grape? they both have eight legs, except for the grape.

TEST! ACTUALLY READ THIS! 1. How do you put a giraffe into a refrigerator? Open the refrigerator, put in the giraffe, and close the door. 2. How do you put an elephant into a refrigerator? Open the refrigerator, take out the giraffe, put in the elephant and close the door. 3. The King of the Forest is hosting an animal conference. All the animals attend except one. Which animal does not attend? The Elephant. The elephant is in the refrigerator. You just put him in there. This tests your memory. 4. There is a river you must cross but it is inhabited by crocodiles. How do you manage it? You swim across. All the crocodiles are attending the animal conference.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It has been this way for two days now. Whenever he looks over his shoulder and past his wing, he can see them there. Following him. The men with the red eyes. He doesn't know what they want and doesn't want to find out. He crosses that road as he has crossed so many others recently, squawking and shuffling along on his stubby legs, darting through traffic in a risky effort to shake them off of his tailfeathers. He gets to the other side and ascends the curb, walking beak-first into a pair of legs hidden beneath a grey robe. He looks up and sees a pair of eyes like burning coals staring down at him from within the darkness of a hood. He tries to run, but it is too late. He has been taken. His wings and fingers are forfeit.

What do you say to a black couple that just got married? Congratulations

Q: why do irish people like swimming A: because it's fun

What did one pare say to the other ... ... WE MAKE A GREAT PARE!!!

What did the elephant say to the poacher? Answer: Dear God in heaven, please don't kill me for my ivory.

What s the difference between a pigeon ?

What's the difference between an ice cream cone and a pile of dead babies? I don't cum on the ice cream before I eat it.

What would you do for a Klondike bar? I'd go all the way to the store and buy one.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

who dosent like to wear shirts and is not straight Petko Manchev

Roeses are purple violets are green WTF u just stabbed me.

Roses are red Violets are blue I gotta go to the bathroom

DING DONG! Did you have to ring the doorbell? You just ruined a good knock knock joke!

Why do leprechauns laugh when they run through the grass? Because it tickles their nuts.

WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

why does a man walks into a bar? it was a metal bar so he probably was retarted

How many alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light bulb? To get to the other side

how do you get your son or daughters attention? break down the door to their room and promptly begin beating them with a wooden baseball and then tie them up to a chair and torture them for 24 hours.

Why did the black person eat fried chicken Because fried chicken tends to be an abundant food in the African American community and that was the quickest and cheapest weekend afternoon food source nearest to his house. It is also found in many other communities throughout the country and even the world. Oh yeah, he was hungry

A lady in a bank was asked by the clerk to round the sum she wanted to raise from her account. She rounded it several times, but the clerk continued to insist that the sum needs to be rounded. She left the bank confused, with a coupon consisting of completely rounded sum of 691, 88$. Next day she returned with a coupon with a rounded sum of 690,88$. The clerk asked again the lady to round the sum. The lady started helplessly to cry and said she had rounded is already with a harp, and couldn't make it round anymore, she even removed the sharp 1 from the sum.

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was holding hands with the first. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? It saw a banana. Why did the fourth monkey fall out of the tree? It slipped. Why did the fifth monkey fall out of the tree? It thought this was all a game. Why did the sixth monkey commit suicide? All his friends were gone.

Why doesn't anybody like the octopus? There anti-social creatures by nature

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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