How to apply total justice 1: Kill all humans! Moral: "Why do I have to die while he gets to live? Nobody gets to live? Sounds fair and just to me!"

what did the therapist say to the other therapist? WE'VE SAID THIS WAY TOO MANY TIMES YOU SHIT

Did you know, even though penguins ARE birds... They don't live in volcanoes?

How did the lawyer survive the airplane crash? He didn't.

What's better than having sex with your mother? Nothing. I'm in love with her, son.

how do you wake up lady gaga you poke her face

what did Susie, the girl with no arms, say after she fell off the swing? nothing, she was killed on impact.

"Hey, why won't you let me through?" "These tickets are fake." "No they aren't. LOOK OVER THERE!" The guard turns around, and then turns back. Minorly inconvenienced, he arrests the man immediately, upon which he is sent to jail and anally raped multiple times.

Annld so the penguin said, "This is my most casual outfit!"

How did the little boy survive the massacre? He didn't. How did the little girl survive the massacre? She was the killer.

Two Irish men walks out of a bar

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

Q: Whats red and circular? A: A red circle

Stephen Hawking walks into a bar. Apparently he can walk now.

I have aids

Why did the baby cross the road? It's abusive father punted it.

Kobe Bryant passing the ball

A Muslim walks into a bomb shop. Unfortunately for the bomb shop owner, the Muslim was a police officer. He proceeded to arrest the owner and the employees of the store, as it turned out that the selling of these particular explosive devices were illegal. They ended up in jail, and justice was served.

why didnt the kid get anything for christmas? santa exploded

The man was so gay he grew breasts and got breast cancer.

A tree falls in the woods. A deaf boy, who had been frolicking through the forest, is struck down by the tree. He dies. His parents are ridden with grief for years, until finally the father commits suicide. The mother soon remarried and had two more children. Both died before the age of 15. She was a horrible mother.

Two drums and a sybol fall off the edge of a cliff. They hit a random pedestrian at the bottom killing him instantly. da-dum ch

What does a blonde's pussy taste like? The same as her brain, cabbage.

Q:What do you call Black Jesus ? A:Black Jesus a.w. j.p.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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