My mom is such a bitch that no one will date her!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!TRUE STORY!! :D

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How come anti jokes r funny

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for his birthday? a new bike.

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Why are you so gay? Because I am unequivocally attracted to the same sex.

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"Guess what I was doing in my room last night with the door closed with my hand?" "Please don't say what I think you're going to say" "What? I was just cleaning my room."

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What did the doctor say to his patient with cancer? "You have cancer...".

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"My c.ock is bigger!" "No! My c.ock is bigger!": Two gamec.ock owners arguing over who has a bigger dick.

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf."

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What do you get when you jump into the Red Sea? Wet.

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What did Jesus say to the giraffe? Good day to you sir.

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Q: What would George Washington do if he were alive today? A: Scream and scratch at the top of his coffin.

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What's orange and sounds like a parrot? An orange parrot.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Tulips are white Daisies are yellow Why am I naming flower colours?

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What is chewy and tastes like gum? Chewing gum.

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Whatever you do in life, give 100%… unless you’re giving blood.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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Why was the firefighter carrying a hot girl? Because her house was on fire.

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Why did the police suspect a Hispanic man of theft? Because they found his fingerprints at the scene.

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Why did the girl get her hair cut off? Because she had cancer

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a terrorist walks into a bank and says "gimme all the money or ill kill you" the bank owner said you and what army the terrorist said this army and no one came in buuuut he opened hi jacket and there was a bomb straped to him then he exploded it Buuuuuuut in hell he thinks hang on a minute i didn't get my money oh for goodness sake Buuuuuuuuuuut in heaven the bank man said i still live in a wonderfull place and anywhay we had no money left and i was going to suiside soooooooooooooooooooooooo you done me a favour and if i would of suiside i could of gone to hell but you killed me so i edidnt go to hell buuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuut you did lol by the way i just wasted your time

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How many Spanish people does it take to screw in a light bulb? Uno

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Whats great about F***ing twenty one year olds? There's twenty of them.

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Dad: sussy, do you know how you were made? Sussy: No, how? Dad: With this DICK!!

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Fill in the _________ Ans: Cup Posted By: Lram

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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