why did the chicken cros the road? Becuase the all the cars were stopped at the near by red light.

What did the clerk say and do when he was givng out free food What he did:Gave them What he said:"If you want to get this free, pay $5.00"

A blonde tries to kill herself cutting both her wrists.Why didn't it work? Because her boyfriend found her just in time and managed to stop the bleeding and took her to the hospital. After some years of therapy they got married and lived happy together for the rest of their lifes.

What's the difference between a Muslim and a box? A box won't blow you up!

Why are asians so smart? Because they study very hard and learn the material.

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's wife? Neither has he.

There once was a man from Nantucket.

A blonde, a brunette, and a red-head are trapped on a desert island together After many days without food, they resort to cannibalism. The blonde eats the brunette, and the red-head eats the blonde. The red-head eventually dies once the water supply runs out.

Two Irish men walk into a bar, order a drink and sit down to enjoy the drink and friednly conversation.

why did jimmy fall of the swing? He had no arms or legs!

did you know that Hellen Keller had a tree house? "no" she didn't know either.

how does an elephant ask for a bun? may i please have a bun?

So a gay guy walks in a bar and asks for a drink. The bartender says "We don't serve your kind, get out." The gay says he will drink in the corner. Later, a construction worker walks into the bar. He says," Man, I'm so thirsty I could drink the sweat off a cows balls." The gay guy in the corners says," Mooooooooo."

hey i just F****d u and this is crazy so delete the number and keep the baby

rosses are red violets are blue poems are hard alligator

69

knock knock GO AWAY I'M IN THE SHOWER

Knock knock. Who's there? Michael Jackson.

A guy walks into a bar. He now has a broken collar bone.

Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have short-term memory loss. And roses are red.

A 14 year old walks into a bar. The bartender yells "Hey, no minors allowed!" The 14 year old yells back "Excuse me? Do you see a fvcking pickaxe?"

Why was Hitler a bad person? He killed himself.

Why did humpty dumpty fall off the wall? Because he was pushed.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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