What's the square root of 69? 8.306623862918075

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why did the chicken cros the road? Becuase the all the cars were stopped at the near by red light.

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How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light-bulb? I'm melting!

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How do you spell dog? C-A-T!

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What did the man on a business trip to Japan say to his wife on the phone? The nuclear reactor in the next city over is melting down as we speak. If I don't see you again, I love you.

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Knock Knock. KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK. ANYBODY HOME?

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How many people can you fit in an oven? A: I Don't know ask a holocaust survivor.

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A man walks into a bar. He's covered in Ash because the north tower just collapsed.

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how does an elephant ask for a bun? may i please have a bun?

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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Well, honestly I don't know how I feel about meeting you yet, or chatting with you, I never believed I would get to speak, or even less meet "The Nero", I mean as far as I know, nobody that ever worked alongside you ever has... ...By the way, the thing with the metal arm, well I don't have both arms, so yeah, story of my life. I am "Eliza" here too, its not coding, its just me sharing my real part of my life with our followers, and well, they do not make much sense out of it, but I get to share the tale about how Nero saved me, if not in person.

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Roses are grey Violets are grey Everything is grey I'm color blind.

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Why did the alligator travel through time? To get to the other side.

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hey i just F****d u and this is crazy so delete the number and keep the baby

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How many eco-friendly people does it take to change a lightbulb? Nobody knows because fluorescent lightbulbs last 6 to 12 years longer than an incandescent lightbulb.

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A man walks into a barn the n was not visible

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Why can't humans fly? Because there is simply no natural way of achieving lift with the bodies that we have. We must use other means to become airborne such as planes and hot air balloons.

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You don't need to know a girls period schedule. Just look in the garbage.

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What's the difference between a joke and an anti-joke? I don't know man, but you touch yourself at night.

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"Ask me if I'm a banana." "Are you a banana?" "No."

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An Englishman, a Frenchman and a German strand on an island. Searching the jungle, they fall into a trap. They get painfully killed and eaten by the cannibals.

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Arsonist: Hey, did you listen to my mixtape? ... It's really good.

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Why did the elephant cross the river? CAUSE YOLO (even though he died)

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What happened when an atheist burned down the home of a priest? He was arrested, charged with arson and sentenced to 5 years in prison.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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