What do family members and a loaf of bread have in common? If you smash them with a hammer they die.

Once upon a time

Roses are Red Violets are Blue I have AIDS we're dying together

Where did the little boy go after the explosion? Everywhere.

How do you scare a black man? Burn his house down.

Why did the crack addict see colors. He was looking at the northern lights

Where do the biggest potatoes grow? the ground.

How do you get an Orphan's hands to bleed? Tell them to clap till daddy gets home.

Where did the boy go after the explosion? Everywhere

A baby seal walks into a club. I happens to be that the club is having their bi-annual PETA meeting, and the baby seal is chosen as the organization's new mascot. After touring the nation and meeting important world leaders, the baby seal still wonders why there was a club at the North Pole.

what has four wheels and opens using a key? -a trunk on wheels

Why did the chicken cross the road ? To get to the other side Why did the lollipop cross the road ? It was stuck to the chicken's head Why did the chicken commit suicide ? He couldn't get the lollipop off its head

whats bloody and mingen Scabbaz head

Why don't women wear watches? In the technological age we live in, the watch is rapidly being replaced with other electronic devices that tell time, such as cell phones or iPods.

a kid plays computer games alot and gets carpoltunel in both hands and lives in pain for the rest of his life.

What do you do if you work in subway? we make the subs put meat on it then put salad on then cut it then wrap it other duites involved but cba to exsplain

There was once a family of tomatoes. A daddy tomato a mommy tomato and a baby tomato. they decided one day to take a walk. but the baby was taking forever so the daddy tomato walked back STOMPED on him and yelled "CATCHUP"

Q: Were did the balls go? A: In the sack.

What was unprecedented about Roosevelt running for president in 1940? He had polio, he couldn't run!

roses are red. violets are violet...

Knock, knock. Who's there? Me. Me Who? Me. Uh.

im gunna build a lego house what shud i make it out of

I slipped and fell in the shower today. Good thing my dad caught me

elen degeneres is straight....

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...