What goes about 36 miles per hour and screams? A baby attached to a ceiling fan.

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how does an elephant ask for a bun? may i please have a bun?

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You know you are from New York when you live in Manhattan.

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Why did the man with no arms, and no legs knock on your door? He can't, he has no arms!

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if a bra is called a over the shoulder boulder holder what is male underware called sincerly, under the butt nut hut

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what did the gay guy get for his birthday aids

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Why would someone smile at a tumble weed? I don't know, it's an inanimate object.And is ugly Just like the couch in the basement in That 70's Show.

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What's worse then dumping your' girlfriend over text? Dumping her best friend over text at the same time.

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What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Getting rape.d by a giant scorpion.

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What's te best part about having sex with twenty two year olds? There are 20 of them ;)

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whats purple with fur?nothing mammals cannot have purple fur

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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If you wanna hear a joke scroll down this page more

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a black man jumps in a pool.

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A man is being followed by a large swarm of mosquitoes. He eradicates them by spraying himself with an insect repellent that has a high deet concentration.

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The Paralympics! Even if you win, you're still retarded!

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What happens when you put a cat in an oven? Don't, because it will die.

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What is green and fuzzy and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

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A man took his son out to play catch. The boy didn't even try to catch the ball. After that the man took his son to the amusement park to have fun. The boy didn't even try to have fun. Then the man took his son to the burger place nearby. Once again the son didn't even touch his food. Finally the man lost his temper and beat his seemingly ungrateful son and cried over the fact that his son was mentally retarded.

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Why'd the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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once upon a time jeff peterson was taking a daily walk when he stops and stares at a strange object. it was an assasin with a knife who slaughtered jeff decapitating his head while his family cry's. THE END

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So these two gay guys walk backwards into a bar.

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What do you get when you put a dog in a cage. Cantaloupes

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into another apple and finding another worm.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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