there are 2 sausages in a pan. one sausage says "wow it's hot in here" and the other sausage says "MY GOD A TALKING SAUSAGE!!!!"

Why did Sally drown? She wasn't wearing a life jacket and it was the the seventh time she had fallen off her water skis today. Her father was not coming back this time.

Por que não passa Globo Esporte na Etiópia? Porque a Rede Globo não tem afiliadas por lá.

Q: Whats worse than 17 babies in 1 bin. A: 1 baby in 17 bins. Q: Whats worse than that. A: 17 bins in 1 baby.

Why did Harry get in the taxi? His mother told him to put his seatbelt on.

My Friday was going great until i realized it's Thursday...

What's the difference between a joke and an anti-joke? I don't know man, but you touch yourself at night.

9/11/01 was a terrible day I got dirt on my suit when touring NY

How many chickens does it take to screw in a light bulb? Any number of chickens plus one person.

There's an American, an African, and a Chinese walking down the street. Because the bar is down there.

Are you a tree? No.

Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It was dead.

Why did the man complain of pain in his ankle? Because several consecutive tissue samples of the area revealed a rapidly metastasizing neoplasm. Blood samples indicated the presence of what appeared to be Hodgkins Lymphoma. The man was very wealthy, however, and had world class doctors treat him. He then donated a vast portion of his wealth to research.

A man with a badly injured arm is sitting in a hospital. He says, "Doctor, when my arm heals, will I be able to play the violin?" The doctor says, "With proper medical attention and rest, yes, you will be able to." The man says, "That's great! Before I was hurt, I really enjoyed playing the violin."

How do you torture Helen Keller? Waterboarding.

What did the deaf, dumb, blind kid get on his birthday? Cancer.

What does Megatron say when a video game takes forever to load? "You have failed me yet again, Start Screen!"

Why was the Nazi killed? for crimes against Humanity

Chuck Norris is a regular human being, just like the rest of us.

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

Three men walked into a bar. They looked around, saw that it was pretty crowded, and decided they'd feel more comfortable going somewhere a little less busy down the road.

Q: What's the meaning of life? A: Look in a Dictionary.

Haiku's are three lines long. This isn't a haiku.

Why doesn't Santa come in the summer? Because it's not Christmas.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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