Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because no human can.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I am colourblind so screw you!

The Olympics

What do you call a car that is green? A Green Car.

Why did Harry get in the taxi? His mother told him to put his seatbelt on.

did you know that Hellen Keller had a tree house? "no" she didn't know either.

How many dead babies does it take to screw in a light bulb? Trick Question. Baby's aren't smart enough comprehend changing light bulbs

what do you call a black guy who flies planes? a pilot

Q: What's the meaning of life? A: Look in a Dictionary.

Why can't humans fly? Because there is simply no natural way of achieving lift with the bodies that we have. We must use other means to become airborne such as planes and hot air balloons.

Haiku's are three lines long. This isn't a haiku.

Miley Cyrus.

how do u piss of a polish man? rape his girlfriend

What's green and fluffy? Red fluff, if you're color blind.

What happened to the guy that fell off the building? He hit the ground

There once was a man from Nantucket.

What does a blonde do in her spare time. Why are you interested, creep!

What did the psychiatrist say to the man when he walked into his office naked and wrapped in saran wrap? I can see your 'nuts'...

the other day i saw a mouse run across my floor. i said "okay" and proceeded with my life

I hate it when i don't forward an email and then i die the next day.

1: Why did the chicken cross the road? 2: The chicken has a right to privacy, stop questioning what she does

A priest, a rabbi, and a Buddhist monk walk into a bar. They discuss their differences over a pint of beer and leave with a greater understanding of each other's faiths.

What has feathers, and is known to fly? A bird

Knock knock Who's there? The police. Your husband has been killed in an accident.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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