Why did the car slam its brakes on? There was a infant under the bonnet.

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into another apple and finding another worm.

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what do you call a black guy who flies planes? a pilot

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A: Knock knock B: Who’s there? A: The police B: The police who? A: Ma’am, your son is dead.

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Why did the car get out of bed? Because the person who owned the car was a total freak and put the car into a bed.

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What happened the magic tractor? It turned into the feild!

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered sex offender

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Why couldn't the man find his watch? Because he was mugged by a homeless man and had severe brain damage..... ....and because he left it at the office

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What's the difference between a duck and a goose? They're two completely different water fowl.

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My mother-in-law is so ugly I actually feel quite sorry for her.

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What happened to the guy that fell off the building? He hit the ground

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I SHOT SOMEBODY!!!! Said no stormtrooper ever.

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So this one time at band camp... a flute gave me an STD.

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If you have a green ball in your left hand and a green ball your right hand, what do you have? Kermit the Frog's undivided attention

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A blonde tries to kill herself cutting both her wrists.Why didn't it work? Because her boyfriend found her just in time and managed to stop the bleeding and took her to the hospital. After some years of therapy they got married and lived happy together for the rest of their lifes.

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What has wings but is often on the ground? An aircraft that has frequent take-off problems.

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How many people can you fit in an oven? A: I Don't know ask a holocaust survivor.

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If a man without hands is called a handicap, what do you call a man without legs? A handicap.

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What do you get when you put a dog in a cage. Cantaloupes

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a short man asked a tall man "hey hows the weather up there"? the tall man couldnt answer cause he was sucked up by a tornado that missed the short man

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Q: Why was the boy sad? A: He dropped his ice cream. Q: Why was the boy mad? A: He dropped his ice cream. Q: Why was the boy in pain? A: Because a clown was ripping off the boys big toes with a hacksaw, all the while causing the small boy emotional pains by killing the boy's orange cat.

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A man walks into a bar. He had to leave promptly because he, according to the law, was too young to be served alcohol.

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Haiku's are three lines long. This isn't a haiku.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To see if he could beat the oncoming car.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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