Knock knock. who's there? Strawberry! Strawberry who? Pickle!

Please Rape William Wright

Your sister's feet smell so bad people encourage her to go home and wash them.

Why is three afraid of four? Because four ate five.

Why did the cow cross the road? It was escorted by its owner to get to the slaughter-house.

Whats worse than sleeping on a bed of hot coals? Lupus

Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

whats thin, long and hard? A: a pen is

Q: How many dead babies can you fit in a blender? A: None. It is a sick and depraved act that is probably illegal anyway.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He looked both ways and saw there was no traffic.

What does DNA stand for? The National Dyslexic Association

It was a dark and stormy night. The whole family waiting for the phone to ring as they await for a criminal to give instructions. Then the phone rings... RING RING Jeffery: "Hello? Yes, sir. Yes, sir. No sir please don't! No, have mercy! Yes sir. No sir, no. Yes sir. Bye." Donald: "What did the man say?" Jeffery: "Wrong number..."

Q: Why did the lady retire? A: Because she had been working for numerous years and felt that she needed to spend more time with her family.

Why couldn't the black man swim? Both of his legs were just eaten by a shark.

What is the difference between finding a dead black man on the street or a dead dog? There are tire marks in front of the dog.

Friend: "Hey man! Did you hear about the kid who bought the last hamster at the pet shop? Other friend: "No..." Friend: "Oh, well he shot himself last night."

your mother is so rather large that when she stepped onto a scale, it stated her exact body weight which was 280 pounds. Which come to think of it isn't that big considering that obesity is now the norm and average people are referred to as abnormal.

What's worse than bombs? Nukes

So, there's a lion loose in Colchester. Should've gone to Specsavers... [L]

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No Neither has he

What is the difference between baseball and the holocaust? One is a fun sporting event…. The other is baseball.

Those who can't teach... Aren't teachers.

chuck norris

whats worse than 100 babies strapped to an atomic bomb? 1 baby strapped to 100 atomic bombs

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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