Why didn't the Priest have a TV ? A black man stole it

thumb_up thumb_down -23

How do you know that you tv has been stolen? It's no longer there.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Q.) What did the young child of a highly idiosyncratic family do when he heard the fire-alarm going off unexpectedly in his house? A.) He started to panic since he hadn't received any portions of formal insturction in the art of, "Stop, drop and roll", prior to the moment of the lamentable catastrophe. I think that we should blame his parents/teachers immediately... *Sigh*

thumb_up thumb_down -23

why did the mom beat up her son with downs because he was matt daly

thumb_up thumb_down -23

A programmer, and engineer and an accountant meet up for an after work drink. Afterwards they go home to their separate apartments and think how socially inadequate they are.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

After thinking hard for a very long time, the pig realized he was a fat, worthless piece of shit.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Q. Why didn't the Atheist enter the church? A. Because Atheists do not go to church so he had no reason to enter.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What is red and green and goes 50mph? A frog in a blender

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What do a plum and a rabbit have in common? They are both purple except for the rabbit.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

2 + 2 = fish

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Girlfriend has 10 letters, but then again, so does freeeeedom

thumb_up thumb_down -23

A group of teenage boys put a flaming bag of dog feces on Old Man Howard's doorstep. He came out and demanded that they stop such behavior at once. They did, and the day went on normally.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

why did the bear fall out of the tree? the bear got shot

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why did the middle-eastern man fly his plane into the Empire State Building? Because he was a bad pilot with an interest in American architecture.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What is worse than finding a worm in ur apple Idk I am asking u

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What's green and bounces? An envious kangaroo.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Whats white and can't climb a tree? A refrigerator

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why is the horny toad named that way? Because its a misnomer of the horned lizard.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervous father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happiness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

A man went to the doctor. He had experienced some strong abdominal pain. The doctor looked at him and ordered some tests to be done. He had a kidney stone. The day after he passed the stone, he got ran over by a bus. The man's name was Bob.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why did the giant try to eat the magical rainbow? A: Because the apocalypse is predicted for the Wednesday after santa gets shot by the evil jolly ice cream man which in secret is cheating on his wife who in turn eats every human baby ever known to man. duhhhhh

thumb_up thumb_down -25

A white man a black man a french man and a mexican are on a sinking ship. The French man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of begets over board. The Black man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of red hot cheetos overboard The Mexican man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of Tacos over board. And then the White man says "we have too many of these" and throws the Mexican man overboard

thumb_up thumb_down -25

My friends told me they found a dead women....they said they pissed on her........that was my mom

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops