Q: what's better than ice cream A: not having aids

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Hey girl, are you from Jamaica? Cus ja makin me go temporarily insane.

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Scientific fact: If you took all the veins from your body and laid them end to end, you would die.

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why was the man walking in the kitchen? idk thats why i asked

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know whats funnier than 24? 25.

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Q)What is the best way to get the bitches? A) You shouldn't try. You could go to prison on bestiality charges.

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Why didn't Jimmy ever get his butt of the couch? His butt was nailed to it and he was also dead. Why didn't his parents save him? they died before he did.

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a black man and his girlfriend are in a car, who is driving? the cop

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Person 1: Knock Knock Person 1: Who's there Person 1: me me you who you me you who me you no me (say super dooper quickly)

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A black man, a mexican, and a muslim all jump off a building. Who hit the ground first? Who cares!

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Stephen Hawking wheels into the Center for Theoretical Cosmology.

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A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The father begins by juggling some balls. The mother pulls out her harmonica and begins playing "Dixie". The children and dog try and get the dog to jump through a hoop. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I can't really remember the reason, it was about 5 years ago and a lot of things have happened since.

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What's brown and sticky? The stuff that comes out of your anus

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Your existance.

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Roses are red, violets are blue a face like yours belongs in a zoo. Don't you worry I'll be there too, not in the cage but laughing at you.

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10 mexicans were driving in a car and went off a cliff. what happend? No one cares.

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Billy was curious if gasoline burns, so he decided to...... .... O crap I'm late for Billy's funeral.

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What was Steve Jobs' favorite fruit? Grapes.

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? It was simply tired of being mocked and judged by society.

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What happened to the deaf, dumb, and blind kid? I don't know. Niether does he.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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Roses are red Violets are blue, I am sorry... But you have terminal cancer and are probably going to die in about 3 months

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what do you call a blonde with black hair? Artificial intelligence

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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